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Do you feel betrayed by someone?
Look where you've betrayed yourself.
Do you feel rejected by someone?
Look where you reject yourself.
Do you feel hated by someone?
Look where you don't love yourself.
∞ THREAD ∞
Look where you've betrayed yourself.
Do you feel rejected by someone?
Look where you reject yourself.
Do you feel hated by someone?
Look where you don't love yourself.
∞ THREAD ∞
The shift I am pointing to in these 3 examples
can be called "healing from within".
In this thread I aim to lay bare the value and mechanism of this,
because the ability to do so will empower you in a way that no compliment, praise or achievement ever can.
can be called "healing from within".
In this thread I aim to lay bare the value and mechanism of this,
because the ability to do so will empower you in a way that no compliment, praise or achievement ever can.
Our automatic response when someone hurts us, rejects us, betrays us
is to see the other as the person doing this
and ourselves as the person who is the subject or victim of this doing.
is to see the other as the person doing this
and ourselves as the person who is the subject or victim of this doing.
Seeing the situation in this way gives us a sense of relief
because now we can clearly point to the cause of the feeling
and we have a conductor for the tension inside of ourselves.
because now we can clearly point to the cause of the feeling
and we have a conductor for the tension inside of ourselves.
In the short term we have solved our uncomfortable feelings
and we might even feel a sense of confidence or certainty
because we feel like being the one who is right or in control.
However, this is a very short term solution...
and we might even feel a sense of confidence or certainty
because we feel like being the one who is right or in control.
However, this is a very short term solution...
...because in a week, a month or a year someone else does or says something
and that same feeling arises.
This shows us that the feelings of
- rejection
- betrayal
- being hated
- abandonment
- etc.
are still dwelling inside of us ready to be triggered again.
and that same feeling arises.
This shows us that the feelings of
- rejection
- betrayal
- being hated
- abandonment
- etc.
are still dwelling inside of us ready to be triggered again.
Let's instead take back the projection that points to the other person
and ask ourselves within:
"What is this experience showing me about myself?"
The answer to this question is sometimes immediately clear
but often it takes time for the insight to come.
and ask ourselves within:
"What is this experience showing me about myself?"
The answer to this question is sometimes immediately clear
but often it takes time for the insight to come.
As a result of asking this question
we don't have an immediate conductor for the tension inside of us.
Instead we become the container of our feelings.
In the beginning this might feel like you are weak
but that is only so because you don't get the fake confidence...
we don't have an immediate conductor for the tension inside of us.
Instead we become the container of our feelings.
In the beginning this might feel like you are weak
but that is only so because you don't get the fake confidence...
...of linking your internal experience to external causes in the form of accusing, blaming or pointing fingers.
Once you get used to containing your own feelings
you will grow stronger and stronger.
You're becoming independent of external causes
and own your experience.
Once you get used to containing your own feelings
you will grow stronger and stronger.
You're becoming independent of external causes
and own your experience.
In this process you will also discover that the feelings you now *experience* instead of *deny*,
will burn away something inside of you.
In that process space is made for insight to enter
because the feeling is allowed to be and unfold.
will burn away something inside of you.
In that process space is made for insight to enter
because the feeling is allowed to be and unfold.
These insights are about the root of your feelings of rejection, betrayal, hurt etc.
Past moments, unconscious motives, unhealed wounds.
Eventually they are always about yourself
and owning this is the start of healing of those wounded roots.
Past moments, unconscious motives, unhealed wounds.
Eventually they are always about yourself
and owning this is the start of healing of those wounded roots.
Examples:
You discover that you abandoned yourself,
by staying in a relationship because you can't be alone with yourself.
You discover that you rejected yourself,
by repressing what you actually want to say in order to please.
You discover that you abandoned yourself,
by staying in a relationship because you can't be alone with yourself.
You discover that you rejected yourself,
by repressing what you actually want to say in order to please.
Now you know the root of those feelings inside of you
rather than focusing on the triggers in the outside world.
Now you also know what to change or accept about yourself
rather than changing the external world.
rather than focusing on the triggers in the outside world.
Now you also know what to change or accept about yourself
rather than changing the external world.
Summary in 2 steps:
allow your own feelings: your attention is already the beginning healing.
insight comes up from within and your inner source guides you how to enforce the healing.
allow your own feelings: your attention is already the beginning healing. insight comes up from within and your inner source guides you how to enforce the healing.
I must admit that "healing from within" isn't for the faint hearted.
You will experience intense feelings that are uncomfortable.
You will doubt yourself, feel weak and vulnerable,
but that is only because you don't take fake strength and confidence as a solution.
You will experience intense feelings that are uncomfortable.
You will doubt yourself, feel weak and vulnerable,
but that is only because you don't take fake strength and confidence as a solution.
I guarantee you that if you take this process seriously:
your true confidence grows exponentially
your relationships will improve
you are more present
your addictions will fade away
you become your own soul mate
your life will feel wholeful (good and bad)
your true confidence grows exponentiallyyour relationships will improveyou are more presentyour addictions will fade awayyou become your own soul mateyour life will feel wholeful (good and bad)
