food cw // y'all aren't gona believe this but uhhhhh a lady gifted me a fuckload of collard greens today so. guess what we're doing

what you need:
1-1.5 lbs of ham hock
at least 16oz of greens (idc if you use collards or not tbh play in the space)
32oz stock or broth (i'm using veggie)
1 medium to large onion
garlic, minced
salt
pepper
crushed red pepper

dice and sauté your whole entire ass onion for 3-5 mins
add garlic and spices, cook for 30 seconds
add broth
add ham hock (it is okay if the broth does not cover the ham hock)
set your instant pot on soup/broth for 35 mins

food cw // look at these happy little fucks

food cw // while my onion and ham are cooking i also received the gift of two fresh and sexy pineapples. do not ask me how i cut the pineapples brenda. i could not tell you if i tried.

food cw // let's grate some FUCKING cheese

food cw // cheese sauce, before cheese

food cw // cheese sauce, After cheese

food cw // do u see those weird clouds? those r salt. i had better not for any reason catch yall not salting yr pasta water it is the year of our lord 2020. there is No Reason. (unless you live low sodium or salt free sorry to yall who do that i still love n respect u)

HOMEMADE MAC N CHEESE
what u need:
macaroni (or other pasta idc)
¼c of flour
1c half and half
1½ to 2c shredded/grated cheese (i like sharp cheddar)
salt
pepper
paprika
onion powder
garlic powder

mix ¼c of your half and half and your flour in a bowl
put that mix in a pot
whisk continously
add remaining h&h
season
cook on medium high heat
seriously treat that shit like your ex you're still checking up on via insta do not leave it alone. it is doing better than u at life.

when it starts to bubble up like yr resentment against said ex turn down to low low low heat
stir in shredded cheese
whisk continuously
if she thicc add more h&h or milk until she is the proper consistency For Ur Taste

meanwhile boil salted water
add macaroni
cook according to package directions
drain and do not rinse i will eat you if you commit this sin against pasta
incorporate cheesy sauce
DONE. MAC N CHEESE.

food cw // the instant pot went off so i added the chopped greens to her and smushed them down into the cooking liquid. she's on manual for 25 mins. (i also snuck in a lil extra garlic & onion powder but thats my tastes not yalls)

i need u all to know that i picked up the bag of greens and it fuckin. ripped open and scattered to the floor and @TimbersShivered just said "leafs! fall comes to me!"

me, sweeping up the leafs: u wana jump in it or

food cw // i made pork chops too

food cw // when your instant pot goes off pull the bones out from your ham hocks. save those for later they can be broth!!! shred your ham. serve hot.