There are certain things that happen when you step into an unfamiliar cultural turf that would be unacceptable if they happened anywhere else - being harassed for PDA, for ex. You should be aware that you won't be afforded every freedom in these spaces, the way you're used to.

I'm of the camp that you don't go into a South Asian grocery primarily frequented by immigrant desis and expect that you are still in an American context. You don't walk down a Mumbai street in a bikini, and you don't kiss your significant other - no matter the sex - in a dhaba.

If you do these things and you get harassed or stared at or disrespected, I'm not going to victim blame you. I'm not going to shame you. That should not have happened to you. I'm also not going to pretend that was a smart thing to do. Adapt, this isn't your turf.

South Asian queers like myself are the ones best suited to challenge heteronormative norms in desi spaces. Desi women are the ones who will challenge norms about women existing in modest clothing, not you. Just.... this really isn't your fight. Step off.