Shin likely thinking that sex is a part of his personal duty to Goldenleonard is a big reason why the possible affair ordeal is going to hurt so much more if it becomes a reality, esp bc his desire for a minister position came first.(1/6)

There SEEMS to be a dichotomy of him perceiving himself as both a "mistress" & a politician. I'm curious on how the queen ordeal is going to play out bc it looks like he still sees it as his duty w/ the parallels of these phrases of overlapping him & Wolfgang having sex.(2/6)

I've been trying to understand the dynamic of their sexual relationship as being mutually enjoyable but thinking about how, for Shin, it didn't have anything to do with love? It was just sex that was amazing & he had bottled up any personal feelings bc it wasn't love to him?(3/6)

& in addition to the idea that sex w/ Wolfgang is probably a way he copes? That idea of wanting to erase what made him feel disgusting w/ what makes him feel good. This idea is nerve wracking, & leaves even MORE room for things to get bad both politically & romantically.(4/6)

& it makes sense for Shin to understand the extent of their personal relationship as something he HAS to do, because that was, in a way, his promise in Chapter 24 IF we understand that whatever Shin was feeling had nothing to do with love necessarily, but duty?(5/6)

It would make his war prize idea make more sense, his reluctance to tell Wolfgang "no", and his overall demeanor in so much of Triple Crown a lot more nuanced and concerning.(6/6)

TLDR these two REALLY need to fucking talk bc none of this is good and i kinda hated writing this but it's been on my mind for a very long time and even more so after the affair realization