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// dereality ? maybe
im constantly tired and want 2 go 2 sleep but im just still the same amount or even more tired after i wake up. changing what times i go 2 bed or wake up and taking naps hasnt helped i just. i dont feel like im here ever i feel like time moves on without me
im constantly tired and want 2 go 2 sleep but im just still the same amount or even more tired after i wake up. changing what times i go 2 bed or wake up and taking naps hasnt helped i just. i dont feel like im here ever i feel like time moves on without me
// religion ment
i feel a bit better going out 2 school or like church even if i dont like being around lots of people it just. i feel at least a little bit alive. like people can see me and i can walk around and theyll call my name or wave at me or even talk 2 me.
i feel a bit better going out 2 school or like church even if i dont like being around lots of people it just. i feel at least a little bit alive. like people can see me and i can walk around and theyll call my name or wave at me or even talk 2 me.
im so deeply unmotiv8ed 2 do schoolwork or like anything really. like all the things i cared about just dont rly matter 2 me rn. and i just want other ppl 2 not feel what i feel and i try so hard 2 make other ppl happy if i think i can.
i dont really trust any1 so i sort of just vent 2 myself. i open up the most 4 my close irls but still i just put on my best during my worst like. "oh im not great right now but we can get through this 2gether" and i take the focus away from myself.
honestly i dont think i *could* be transparent with some1 about how i feel even if i trusted them and i wanted 2. like i wouldnt b able 2 describe it really. and i h8 how im usually venting 2 ppl recently or asking about school rel8ed stuff.
and i know after i slam down my thoughts on this thread ill go look at oomfs posts and b all merry n shit. i just dont like anything thats happening 2 me right now i just wanna get away from it all but i feel trapped in a body i dont feel like is my own.
