Emily Temple is my enemy now. https://lithub.com/every-mr-darcy-ranked/

I will not rest until I have destroyed her and every list she has ever written.

This is blatantly false. FALSE. He had the charisma of wet cheese. White Women must be stopped.

I am so mad I can feel my eyeballs boiling

She better cross to the other side of the internet street when she sees me coming, that’s all I know. Because it’s on sight.

This is the worst thing I have ever had to witness with my human eyes.

There are not “Firth people” and “Macfadyen people.” There are righteous and good people and there are people with no taste or love in their hearts.

Keira Knightley’s jaw acting is still the worst thing about that anemic and ersatz adaptation. But his utterly lifeless Darcy is right up there.

I am so sick of y’all pretending it’s cool to have no standards. Jeans in church culture has gone too far.

I feel physical hatred toward this list.

People think that the 2005 adaptation of Pride and Prejudice is good exist in some kind of weird alternate dimension, and I just cannot pierce their occult and violent vision for the world.

That movie is BAD. It is bad. It looks pretty. But it is bad in almost every other conceivable way. The acting is bad. The screenplay is bad. The pacing is bad. The editing is bad. The direction is PERPLEXING. Even the blocking sometimes boggles the mind. LIKE, COME ON.

I'm sure Keira Knightley needed a sleep guard after she was done making that movie.

Macfadyen's Darcy is a limp noodle at its best and dry oatmeal the rest of the time. I do not understand how y'all...can lie to yourselves. Like, okay, you like to look at him, alright, sure. But don't piss on my leg and call it good acting! GET OUT OF HERE.

Emily Temple has to pay for these crimes.

She has insulted my house and I will have satisfaction.