You ever feel like you genuinely have an incredible once-in-a-generation brain and you’ve completely wasted it on social media and tv and porn because your ability to synthesize information is worthless without discipline and motivation and you just want to die

How many Marxes could we have had lol

God I’m worthless

Pleas throw me into the fucking dump where I belong I am a worm

I coulda been a contendah......

I only feel even more pathetic because I’ve never been able to discharge the adolescent fantasy that I was meant to be something special, that I was meant to communicate insights to other people that I was particularly capable of achieving and the fact that I can’t let go of that

Is something that in my self consciousness—which is to say my own disgusting self obsession and self importance—I recognize as evil and sad and low and freakish and yet I can’t convince myself to ever fully abandon and it only magnifies the hideousness of what I am

The state of being nothing and yet believing I should’ve been something, and yet knowing that that is delusion, idk man.

This is why I listen to fourth wave emo