Ok I’m bored. Like this tweet and if ndiyakwazi, ndizokuxelela iindaba zakho.

@Mpumz_N you are not s size queen. Clocked you.

@sugeezy you have a big mouth. Or fingers? Ndifuna utazzwe

@moesuttle stop kissing strangers at groove. Aren’t you scared of herpes? Yayazi inyebethu?

@busaniim_ pretty and light skinned privilege gone to waste. You’re my biggest disappointment. You’ve never took us to Dubai with your looks

@anentiresnack you once saw bogus Dr SwatyuPenz jogging, wafuna akubhuqe esantini kodwa umithi. No wonder umntanakho ekhuphoxa okokoko

@NeroExp of all the straight guys I follow, zange watyholwa nentombi. Awupikwa nopikwa. You even looked sad eZanzibar, on a solocation, waqubha ngee gumboots. Is your beard even real?

@leboclive not you blocking the entire gay community for a man kodwa umhle Another huge disappointment. Pretty gays don’t have to do much but you do a lot. Be pretty and own it

@___zesty iPhone yakho yabhaqwa emsintsileni wenye intombi but wena wayosula nie ngomkhono, waqhubeka ne party. I’ve limited my interactions with you ever since. Ndiyakoyika

@simpratyalimpi you showed me a guy you liked and I didn’t approve. You went to him anyway, lamfana wase wacela indawo emzini, nanikwa igarage nalala kuyo. You never thought of going home once.

@_Mihlali_ I was standing with Mpumi outside Great Dane and you came to greet us. I hid our phones when you approached. Or was it @timnagwabe ? I can’t tell yous apart coz niyalingana but I was genuinely scared for my life

@haibojack remember when you lost your friends eRands. You recognized me from Twitter and asked me to help you. I carried you like this while we looked for them

@ItsMbasa ayinguwe lo watakela eRhawutini nge bus usese high school? Nguwe maan. You were famous for that here, around 2011 or so. Oko wayeka izinto ezi funny

@wfreemantle ha.a ukhule ngomthendeleko wena nje sikhule nge Nestum thina, I cant say anything offside. You even play netball as a shooter because the pole reminds you of the cross. Uxolo, I can’t drag you. Maps already has and look where that got him. Bun’s in

@wfreemantle kutyiwa kanje kokwenu every Sunday kuthiwa yi Last Supper. No guessing sisandla sikabani esi that just blessed the communion

@Shoun_B yonke into oyibhakayo, iphuma inezitshanguba

@NotYetUhuru_ you were once thirsting over a guy yathi izokutya ikuku yakho uyibookishele iseat yayo separately xa ugoduka. Wade waya ke? Ndiyakwazi awuthi kusasa, nangoku wophuke usendleni eya kwenye. Khobalise ngala mfana