“A tractor? Your phone and IPad got run over by a tractor?”
“Yes Brian. It was purely by accident”

“Phone and iPad, smashed to bits.”
“Oh dear”
“No Brian, I believe it was a John Deere in this instance”

“Weren’t you fond of your devices Mr Maguire?”
“It wasn’t a substantial relationship Brian. I would characterise it as being more a bit of a crush”

“What about the USB?”
“I don’t what that is Brian. Is it some kind of farm machinery?”
“The USB. The memory stick”
“Nothing sticks in my memory Brian. Ever since the front fell off outside Wagga Wagga”

"So now Mr Maguire it's been alleged that you were asking federal government officials in regards to a visa..."
"Well I'd maxxed out my own credit cards Brian. I thought they might have a spare one lying around"