Thread by @SketchyBones, Despite having a really productive day today to start the week, just [...]

Jessica Soleigh

SketchyBones

Despite having a really productive day today to start the week, just feeling this weird wave of dread creeping in.

I& #39;ve spent the last several years trying to quietly recover from health problems, but in the process I& #39;d really fallen to the wayside in my career and it...hurts. A lot.

So for the first time in those several years I finally feel like getting back into everything I loved so much again is actually possible...but that doesn& #39;t mean the pain and doubt hurdles aren& #39;t there anymore.

For the past 8-ish? years it feels like I& #39;d been dragging myself through a marathon on a broken leg. Barely getting to each checkmark and afraid of the fallout if I quit. But I did irreparable damage and I regret not tapping out when I should have so much.

It& #39;s why I yell (lovingly) at friends when I see them not acknowledging their burnout. I don& #39;t want to see others go through the same pain and regret I did.

But *I& #39;m* also still here despite everything and just looking around like...I finally gave myself permission to heal, so what comes next?

There& #39;s no way I& #39;m going to throw out all that I DID work so hard to achieve, but I also don& #39;t want to go back to doubting myself so much that I let myself get stuck in work I was absolutely unhappy with in the long run.

That& #39;s the biggest thing I AM done with.

I& #39;ve definitely been worried I might be pigeonholing myself and be passed up because of it by other places, but I& #39;ve had more regrets pushing aside each year what I& #39;ve always really wanted to do for decades now and I can& #39;t have that eating away at me anymore.

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