(thread)
we keep forgetting this, but in discussions about the word queer i think it's important to know that some people acting in good faith here *are* genuinely uncomfy with the word.

keep in mind that incompatible needs doesn't mean one or the other is *wrong*.

like, we're queer, and we can't really censor the word or anything because of our own traumas.

we know that'll alienate some people, and we don't have anything against them, their traumas are valid too, but it's not something we can do a ton about per se?

like it's not okay to erase the decades of effort that have gone into reclaiming the word, but that's not what being personally uncomfy with it is doing.

it can be really hard to remember that when that conflict of needs can lead to a relative lack of shared spaces there.

i don't have all the answers, but i do know that assuming everyone who's uncomfy with the word is acting in bad faith is *not* the solution.

i understand the instinct to think that way, but two groups with incompatible needs just vilifying each other is the whole problem!

and more broadly, fear and passion obscuring nuance is the big thing that's hurting our communities. so do please be careful about that.

(end thread)
anyway love y'all, stay safe