So. Real talk.

I've accepted that ACB is going to be on SCOTUS. (We should still fight it, I mean, don't give up. The fact that you're going to lose doesn't mean stop fighting.)

I'm not going back in the closet. So what does that mean for my possible future?

If my marriage is made illegal at a federal level, my wife loses health insurance. This is a huge, possibly bankrupting, consequence of ACB.

If being gay costs me my security clearance, I could be fired. This is a loss of income, health insurance for my family, and bankruptcy.

If being a cis woman costs me my bodily autonomy in a medical setting, I will either receive inappropriate health care or I will avoid seeing a doctor, both of which will lead to an early death for me. Assuming I haven't been fired for being gay and still have health insurance.

My kid could be swept up by an ICE raid and sent to their country of origin if the courts no longer recognize their adoption by a same-sex couple as legal. That adoption is the foundation of my kid's citizenship.

My right to patronize businesses and institutions could be challenged by local religious organizations whose rights of bigotry would be protected by the federal courts, while my right to exists while a lesbian would be eroded.

If I have to prove I am an appropriately moral person to have full citizen and human rights, I may not pass such tests, impacting home ownership, civic participation, and the protections of civil society.

How likely is any of this?

No one knows.

But it's time to buckle up and face the possibilities. It's better to have a plan, my queerdlings, than not.

Save your money. Have it where you can get it.

Make a will. Get a power of attorney. Get medical advance directives. If you need to explicitly deny some family member power over you, do it NOW.

Explicate who is to care for your children.

Start squirreling away your meds, a dose or two at a time, build a cushion. See a dentist now, get any medical you have been putting off done now, in case your marriage is voided and you no longer have health care.

Build strong personal ties with your landlord, your supervisor, your neighbor. Make sure they think of you as one of the Nice Ones. Make them want to give you the Shirley Exception. ("I know that's the rule, but, surely, we can make an exception for you! I mean, I know you!")

If you need to start pulling back into the closet, go. It's okay. It really is. Your safety is more important. Outlive the bastards and spit on their graves.

And if I'm wrong?

If nothing terrible happens?

Great!!

You've saved some money, gotten your estate planning done, made a meds cushion, and traded amazing cocktail recipes with your boss. No worries.

All the queers you know who are my age, we've been here before. It was shitty. But we are here now. This is not uncharted territory. You have a map, and a light, and traveling companions in dark places.

Solidarity, queerdlings. Solidarity.

Oh, P.S.:

We all used to have deals about who we would marry if we had to, to have rights and be safe. Look at your friends groups. Talk it out. Make a plan. Who will marry whom, if y'all have to?

Get through it. Live. Do what you have to, but live.