(1/15) I posted this on Facebook yesterday and didn't anticipate the reaction I got from friends and colleagues. Twitter be kind as I'm sharing in case anyone else has struggled with mental health as I have

(2/15)(TL:DR - I get anxiety and it's made my life hard work. Don't struggle alone. Talk to someone (anyone) and look after your mental health like you would physical health.)

I'd always had mild anxiety through school and underlying symptoms which I now know as OCD.

(3/15) It wasn't until my 2nd year of uni where this became a big issue. I'd been drinking a lot through my first year and I started getting intrusive thoughts. They were so disturbing that it took me around about 9 years to get a diagnosis of what was wrong with me.

(4/15) 9 years of pretty much waking up in a cold sweat every morning, crying myself to sleep and drinking too much to blank things out. Through this time I confided in a few close friends and my parents but aside from that battled it alone

(5/15) (I somehow managed to smash out a 1st class degree in maths, a masters and a decent job too - In some ways I'd compare myself to a high functioning alcoholic)
In 2002 I got a diagnosis of OCD and it was one of the best days of my life.

(6/15 )I wasn't going crazy after all and a decent psychologist taught me CBT which change my life. I only wish I'd put my hand up 9 years earlier. I also met my now wife that year and she accepted me anxiety and all. Fair to say she saved me from myself.

(7/15) Things were great until about 2009. Kids were both young and work started to get on top of me. I went from loving my job to dreading going to work each day. The business I worked for went through a merger and it felt like every day was an extended job interview.

(8/15) Back to a counsellor to get me through it but it was a sticky plaster until I left that job a few years later.
6 months in to my new job I had a mini break down. I was on a Birmingham hotel room (I was away from home about 2/3 night a week at that point)

(9/15 ) and took a call from a colleague which probably saved me from doing something stupid. I got in the car, drove home and spent 2 weeks in bed. It was the wake up I needed and I found another psychologist who diagnosed GAD (generalized anxiety disorder)

(10/15) which basically means I worry about everything! CBT again was the result plus medication which I still take today.

Fast forward to now and I'm doing pretty good. I take medication every day and when I come off it I hit a wall straight away.

(11/15) I take a very small dose but its enough to take the edge off my obsessions. I've accepted I'll be taking it forever. Exercise helps a lot (except when I start obsessing about my pace and times!) and not drinking this year has made me much more robust.

(12/15) Diet and sleep are also big triggers for me. I've also hugely cut back on caffeine which helps too. I've also found a job I love, with people I enjoying working with and who accept that I'll have crap days as well as awesome ones.

(13/15) I still have frequent days where I don't want to get out of bed or the anxiety creeps up on me over time. Work is still the overriding trigger. I'm a perfectionist about work - but not about much else as my wife will attest to.

(14/15) So that's my self indulgent story. I can't emphasize how supportive my wife is or to give her credit for keeping me sane. I'm an ass to live with and obsess over stupid shit. She's what holds it all together and keeps going with the kids when I'm stuck under the duvet.

(15/15) I'm also not too supportive when the shoe's on the other foot as anxiety makes me rather self obsessed. So she deserves a medal (and I don't tell her that enough)