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I& #39;m baffled by this battle between autism parents and #ActuallyAutistic people. I& #39;m a late dx autistic mother of an autistic child. I guess some of the autism parents would call him severely autistic. I& #39;ve been his mother for longer than I& #39;ve known I& #39;m autistic.
The autism parents would either question whether I really am autistic or say that I& #39;m high functioning.
In many ways I probably am. In others I& #39;m very much not and the cost to me of functioning where I do is huge. Public meltdowns. Self harm. Loss of future function.
In many ways I probably am. In others I& #39;m very much not and the cost to me of functioning where I do is huge. Public meltdowns. Self harm. Loss of future function.
When my son was little I went along with a lot of what the professionals suggested even though it was very distressing for both him and me because they were professionals. Then I met the online autistic community. I learnt from them that my instincts were right and why.
They enabled me to distinguish between my son& #39;s actual needs and the needs those around him had of him, and to recognize when a professional was prioritizing the latter over the former. They empowered me to advocate for my son. They have helped me to ensure my son& #39;s happiness.
They could only do this because I listened. I listened because I realised that they understood what it& #39;s like to be autistic far better than I did. Yes I knew my son better. But I didn& #39;t understand why my son had a meltdown anytime he was near a barbecue or candles (clue: smoke).
Even when I thought I was NT they never oppressed me, bullied me, marginalized me or gaslit me. All things that the same people are now being accused of. It& #39;s a disgusting and intentional campaign of harrassment against a marginalized group of people in their own space.
Being a speaking autistic who can work gives me a lot of privilege. I recognize that, as does every other speaking autistic advocate I see. It& #39;s about time the autism parents recognized their own privilege.
