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Something many cis people aren& #39;t ready to talk about is that if we made medical transition less of a big deal, it might actually be possible to make detransition less of a sunk cost fallacy and easier to pursue, not harder.
As someone whose parents immediately discussed detransition as a possible outcome for me without judgement, AND retransition after that too, and who generally said I could decide whatever, whenever, as many times as I wanted without judgement?
If you say that to start HRT is the BIGGEST DEAL POSSIBLE and you BETTER BE SURE FOREVER AND EVER, that is way more influential than giving someone blockers saying "change your mind as much as you want; you will never be wrong or broken or weird".
If you say you have to be ride or die to get literally ANYTHING, that is way more likely to result in people not 100% sure going full in than like.
Saying "hey, we& #39;ll help you no matter if you& #39;re a hundred percent sure or not".
Saying "hey, we& #39;ll help you no matter if you& #39;re a hundred percent sure or not".
How can you expect people not quite sure to say "I started HRT but six months in I& #39;m not sure if it& #39;s working for me" if you tell people the ONLY way to justify ANYTHING but not being 100% cis is to be fully in on EVERYTHING?
You wanna support detransitioners? I do too. So make it less of a big fucking deal. Make it something you can change your mind about any time, as many times as you like. Stop treating it like some grand decision. The less dramatic you make it, the easier it is to change your mind
As it turns out, the best way to accommodate detransition is not more gatekeeping. It is often less. Less judgement, less rigidity, less PANIC about the idea you should consider people with bodies, experiences, lives that are not rigid, are complex and individual.
And even trans people feel this! It is so hard to talk about bc transphobes appropriate it. But trans people are pressured into stuff we don& #39;t want, bc we are told All Or Nothing is the ONLY option.
AFAB people told "get a hysterectomy or nothing". AMAB people told "if you don& #39;t at least get an orchi, you shouldn& #39;t bother". Intersex people period given bullshit advice based less on needs, more on making society comfortable.
It& #39;s all bullshit.
Every one of us would do better with less pressure, more breathing room, more kindness. Period.
Every one of us would do better with less pressure, more breathing room, more kindness. Period.
P.s. no person, no person& #39;s body is "broken". Any cis person trying to leverage that shit against any detransitioner is a cruel exploitative asshole with no understanding of how hard it is, period, to live with a body society deems non normative.
