You know that feeling where you want to cry all day? Yeah, that's me. I'm so tired. Being anyone involved with @NYCSchools is tiring right now. There's not enough time to vent and grieve and rage and cry over how destructive all this is, while also trying to fend off a pandemic.

Students/staff coming into school with fevers, leaving schools to pick up the pieces. Students/staff across @NYCSchools needlessly exposed. The workload is completely unsustainable made that way by a bad staffing deal by @NYCMayor @uft.

It didn't have to be this way at all. 2/

Students and parents asking why they only see an educator on days they're in-person, why they don't have instruction 3-4 days a week. Educators having to answer that there's no staff and to call @NYCMayor to change it. Nurses and subs being bribed to workcuz of shortages. 3/

A parent called today, said their other child is fully remote cuz their school shut down (that school’s in the orange zone) and if ours will close (we're in the yellow zone). I told the truth: that we're half an ave away from that border line & we could very well close soon. 4/

Meanwhile I know my students with special needs need more. We're not supposed to use paper cuz you can't disinfect it. Everything has to lie online. Spending so much of my day troubleshooting WiFi, password, devices not charged, permissions on Google forms, Zoom permissions... 5/

So much time spent doing IEP documents so they don't go out of compliance for my special ed students who I don't know particularly well yet, and working with the IEP team and doing our best to ensure the right services and settings for kids. That alone is a lot right now 6/

But, none of that compares to the anxiety of ever-changing plans and fear based on #covid19 creeping to our neighborhood and doorstep. If we were across the street our school would be closed right now. Students and families and staff live in the orange and red zones. 7/

I've been getting tested for #COVID19 almost every week at this point, and I literally sometimes dream about getting the virus so my school shuts down and doesn't have to go through this farce of a plan. THAT IS SO SICK AND TERRIBLE AND I CAN'T BELIEVE I HAVE THOSE THOUGHTS!! 8/

I don't want to get sick, of course. But with this schools plan, when I'm already freezing in my classroom, the ventilation reports don't actually say the air change rates and winter is coming, we're sitting ducks sitting in the same classroom for 5 hours if there's #COVID19. 9/

With the cancelled/postponed/who knows retro lump-sum payment for 10+ years of work rendered, we're reminded that we're dead last in priorities, that we're paying for tech and teaching supplies out of pocket always. @NYCSchools staff exhausted and TENSE right now. 10/

My admin and staff are trying our very best to make school okay for students and make this work, but none of this is workable. After the postponed retro check for this week, so many @NYCSchools educators have had it. I predict something is going to happen soon. It's too much. 11/

I truly fear for the future of education after this. So many educators who love teaching and love this job when it's possible are going to leave because the job has now become impossible to do. It continues to be even more impossible every hour, every day. 12/