So I went out for a walk and decided to pop into an almost empty local pub
Staff masked up - table service only, just a few regulars in
Two blokes at a nearby table chatting and of course I perked up
Bloke1: Yeah I got these jeans online last week

Bloke2: Yeah I noticed - not seen you in jeans before
Bloke1: It was the pockets that I got them for
Bloke 2: What’s different about the pockets

Bloke1: ten of them
Bloke2: who needs ten pockets
Bloke1: I don’t need a bag or a coat when I go out
Bloke2: ten - that is mental
I am now being treated to him showing off his pockets

He has a pack of bacon in his lower leg pocket

And of course there are “pockets within pockets”
Bloke2: how long has that bacon been in there for
Bloke1: I got in on the way to meet you
Bloke2: get them to put it in the fridge
Bloke1: I’ve got a torch pocket
Me

Bloke2: have you got a f***ing torch
Bloke1: no but I’ve ordered one
Bloke2: Another beer
Bloke1: my shout

Bloke2 is now laughing as Bloke1 is trying to find his wallet

A big bar of chocolate, not in the best state, has been pulled out of a mid thigh pocket
But the wallet has been found
Bloke2: I’ve never had a torch

I think they are looking a jeans or torches online

Bloke1 has gone to the loo
Bloke2: is on the phone - “yeah I’m just leaving - I’ve been talking to John about his jeans”

We all left the pub together and stepped out into the rain and I guess he had the last laugh as he pulled a a small telescopic umbrella from one of his ten pockets