idk i hope it goes w/o saying that anything i say about porn should be taken w/ a grain of salt bc it comes out of my own exp & perspective, which— being someone who has never been assaulted & has a p healthy relationship w/ sex— is rarer than i usually think it is

the things in porn that i find disgusting and offputting and dont want to engage with are usually pretty trivial things (like ahegao lmfao), so i just take it for granted that i dont have to justify my boundaries nor can i enforce them by telling ppl what theyre allowed to like

everyone has both a right and a responsibility to enforce their own boundaries, and to learn to delineate between enforcing boundaries and infringing on the autonomy of other people. this is never simple, often very difficult, and always subjective!!!

its not gonna change my fundamental values but i do think i could stand to be a bit more patient and merciful with like, knowing how often these takes that i find very bad and aggravating are driven by trauma, bc like ofc trauma makes you irrational &thats v different from malice