wwx accidentally finding out he can connect to his (hot) neighbor lwj's printer and he starts printing random stuff from it to see what lwj does

i just imagine that one day, wwx's own printer runs out of paper or something and he's like "huh i wonder if i can use the one in the lobby??" opens up the devices window and sees 'Printer' with no password needed and he's like yeah that HAS to be the lobby.

wwx prints out this spongebob meme that he's going to stick on jiang cheng's door later. runs down to the lobby and waits by the printer by the front desk. nothing comes out and he's about to ask an employee about it and then lwj shows up

lwj: Excuse me, I don't know how this happened, but *holds up spongebob meme* this just came out of my printer? Have I Been Compromised?

wwx: SHIT.

lwj: oh, wei ying. what are you-

wwx: *runs back upstairs* SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT

weeks pass. during these weeks, lwj and wwx get closer and become good friends and wwx has A Maybe Big crush on him. and one day he notices that lwj is... sad? he just has a look on his face that makes wwx's chest hurt.

wwx offers to talk to lwj about it and lwj is like "No, it's okay" and heads inside his apartment and wwx is like. well. desperate times call for desperate measures.

heads to his laptop and finds a cute bunny pic

prints it to 'Printer'

wwx immediately presses his ear to the wall between their apartments to see if he can catch lwj reacting to the picture. it's quiet for a long minute and then wwx finally hears:

"Brother, what are the chances a ghost is haunting my apartment?"

wwx: oh, now it's time to have some real fun

wwx wants to try the bunny thing again so on a separate day, he sends another bunny pic to lwj's printer and wants so desperately to see lwj's reaction to it. so he grabs a jacket he borrowed from lwj and goes to return it just so he can try and catch The Reaction

wwx doesn't realize that in his frenzy to quickly print the picture and get to lwj's apartment fast enough, he accidentally queued up 100 pages of the pic to be printed. he knocks on lwj's door with the jacket in hand and when lwj opens it he's like "lan zhan!"

"i just remembered i have your jacket? i came to return it, sorry for the... uh...." he notices the printer set up on the corner table in lwj's apartment is just spitting out paper and it's all falling to the floor.

wwx looks more closely and sees dozens of bunny faces and he's like SHIT. "uh, lan zhan, what are you printing over there? hahahha... hahaha..."

lwj just stands there silently

one day, lwj does something so incredibly cute and wwx can't handle it and thinks about it the whole day. decides to vent his frustration by sending this pic to lwj's printer. lwj is very confused.

lwj is a smart man though? at all of these mysterious printings, wouldn't he figure out that someone is messing with him? wouldn't he put a password that prevents random people from using his printer?

no.

because one day lwj's printer spits out more memes and at the same moment, he can hear wwx wailing with laughter across the wall and he's like ah. so it's wei ying.

lwj keeps everything that's printed from then on.

really the hilarity in all this is that lwj is now spending an insane amount of money on ink and paper.

one day wwx finds this recipe online for a spicy dish and tries printing it for himself but it's not working for some reason? whatever. he's too tired to try and figure out why. doesn't realize his setting is still on lwj's printer so it printed over there instead.

a few days later, he goes to eat dinner at lwj's apartment and lwj made the spicy dish. wwx's like wow what a coincidence!!

wwx: im going to go grab some water, lan zhan
lwj: mn

wwx goes and grabs a cup and as he's drinking, he sees the printer recipe on lwj's counter. wwx starts choking.

jiang cheng knows all about what wwx's doing because wwx keeps laughing about it to him. jiang cheng goes over to lwj's apartment one day to pick up some stuff that lwj offered to provide for yanli's upcoming bday

while he's there, wwx prints "Lan Zhan is so handsome! Jiang Cheng... " and he waits 10 seconds and then hears "WEI WUXIAN! I SWEAR TO GOD-"

a few minutes later someone knocks on wwx's door and he opens it and jc throws a crumbled up piece of paper at his head and goes "you are so fucking lucky he was in the other room when it printed"

wwx's like "wow... jiang cheng, if our positions were switched, i would've eaten the paper for you just to hide it" and jc's like "I WOULD NEVER DO SOMETHING THIS IDIOTIC"

anyway the main event here is really that wwx is falling in love with lwj and wants to confess to him but is too nervous to do so.

here comes wwx's Genius idea to just confess to lwj by writing out all his feelings in a love letter and printing it directly over to him.

and wwx really put his entire heart and soul into this letter. talking about how much he appreciates lwj. how lwj makes him happy on his saddest days. makes him genuinely smile on days where wwx has been faking it. how lwj cares for him in ways no one has before.

when he's done writing the letter, he holds his breath and prints it. any second now, lwj will see it.

meanwhile, lwj in his apartment: *panicking because his bunny just chewed through the printer cable and now it's offline*

and wwx waits. and waits. and waits. but lwj never comes to his door, either to confess his reciprocated undying love or to tell wwx that he's not interested. at this point wwx doesn't care which one it is, he just Needs an answer.

wwx can't take it anymore so he decides to go take a walk outside but at the same time he leaves his apartment, lwj also leaves his. and they just stare at each other and wwx feels his knees go weak.

wwx: hi lan zhan!
wwx internally: FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

lwj: hello wei ying
lwj internally: wei ying is so handsome today. i love wei ying. wei ying love of my life?

wwx's really confused because lwj HAD to have seen the letter? but he's not saying anything? then again, wwx didn't sign it or anything. he was kind of hoping that lwj would just... Know who it was from, but maybe he doesn't?

wwx: lan zhan, where are you headed this late?
lwj: something... inconvenient just happened.
wwx: oh. with what?
lwj: my printer.

wwx:

wwx's like "haha, hope whatever happened wasn't too annoying" and lwj's like "it was actually very annoying. i wish it'd never occurred" and wwx's like welp.

lwj: and where are you headed to this late, wei ying?
wwx: hell, probably. *heads back inside apartment and closes door*

wwx: ok. calm down. it could be anything. maybe it's not about the letter. or maybe it is and lan zhan just needs a while to collect his thoughts? ill give it a day before i panic.

lwj, at the tech store: What Do You Mean It's Going To Take A Week To Order A Replacement Cable

a day passes and lwj never brings anything up to wwx. wwx is like "ok MAYBE when the letter printed the first time, it flew underneath a table and lwj didn't see it. so ill just print it again."

wwx goes to print it and lwj's printer is now inaccessible to him

wwx's train of thought is now "oh my god the letter pissed lan zhan off so much that he completely blocked my IP and turned his printer offline just so that whoever was bothering him can leave him the fuck alone and th-"

lwj in his apartment, scolding his bunny: bad bunny. bad.

but wwx's like you know what! that's okay! because lwj doesn't know im the one who printed it anyway! or does he?

the next time wwx and lwj hang out, wwx brings up the printer again

wwx: so, about the printer inconvenience you had... it wouldn't have anything to do with, uh, that person who's printing random things to your place, right?

lwj, who has never brought this up to wwx: wei ying-

wwx: because that's like, such a pain in the ass, you know? did you ever figure out who it was?

wwx internally: please say no please say no
lwj internally: does wei ying want me to know it's him?

lwj: yes... i did figure out who it was.

wwx wants to say "bullshit" but the word dies in his throat because the way lwj is looking at him.... he has to know. he definitely knows.

wwx: you... know it's me, lan zhan?

lwj: yes. i know it's you, wei ying.

wwx's like oh. this is what heartbreak feels like.

lwj gets a new cable that night and plugs it in. as his printer comes back to life, he waits for the inevitable influx of papers from wwx. but they never show up.

and wwx is also acting strange now. distant. lwj sees a sadness in his eyes that he hasn't seen before.

it lasts days. lwj can never catch wwx for long enough to talk to him about it.

lwj really misses the bunny pics.

then one night, lwj tries printing an essay for one of his classes and it's not working. when he goes to investigate, he finds out that his printer disconnected from the internet after the cable fiasco and hasn't been reconnected since.

lwj reconnects it to the internet.

two letters immediately print and fall onto his floor.

lwj picks a letter up and reads it. reads everything from "You are good, so good, too good" to "im. fuck. uiahdusahd. BARK ARF ARF over you. you know????" to "Is it weird to say that your smile is like sunlight reflected over snow?"

and lwj can't tear his eyes away from the last sentence:

"Lan Zhan. I just really, really like you."

and lwj knows it's wei ying who wrote it. every word oozes wei ying. he has such a vibrant and unique personality and it shines in everything, even through his writing.

lwj is happy for a split second, and then it clicks why wwx has been upset all week.

lwj needs to fix this immediately.

lwj picks up his phone and takes a breath when he hears someone pick up

lwj: do not ask why i'm calling you.
jc: why the fuck are you calling me

lwj: it's about wei ying. would you happen to know-

jc: -why he called me drunk crying at 1 AM last night?? you tell me

lwj: ...he what?

jc: yeah. so listen, i'm not going to sit here and give you the whole "even if you don't like him, at least let him down easy" talk because i think everyone who has eyes knows you love him.

lwj: ...

jc: im guessing you're calling because you'd like to clear up whatever misunderstanding happened. tell me what the fuck you need so i can go to bed.

lwj: ...would you happen to know the password needed to use his printer?

jc: ........you idiots are fucking made for each other

turns out the password is "lanzhaaaaan" and lwj, after he hangs up, tries to ignore how that makes him feel because he needs to focus. he needs to fix this. he needs to craft a letter so elegant and loving that wwx can never doubt his feelings for him.

lwj grabs his laptop

lwj sends the following to wwx’s printer:

lwj almost trips over his feet running to stand outside wwx’s door and he hears:

“what.... the FUCK”

he smiles.

“FOR FUCKS SAKE NOW I ONLY HAVE TWO PIECES OF PAPER LEFT AND I NEED TO PRINT OUT AN ESSAY SHIT”

lwj stops smiling.

lwj just stands there as he hears wwx grumbling up a storm and then the door swings open. wwx doesn’t see lwj standing there and bumps into him

wwx: ...lan zh-
lwj: Wei Ying I am so sorry. I will pay you for the paper I wasted. I will go buy you paper right now. I will-

wwx's face gets progressively redder and redder as lwj keeps apologizing for using his paper and it gets to be so much that he claps a hand over lwj's mouth to stop him from talking

wwx: you... lan zhan, you printed that?
lwj: mgffgh

wwx freezes and won't take his hand off lwj's mouth, so lwj grabs it and slowly removes it. but he laces their fingers together when he does.

lwj: wei ying. i apologize. i just saw your letter today. my printer's been offline so everything is printing now and-

wwx, not even paying attention because he's so glad jc talked him out of drunk printing the following image 100 times to lwj's printer:

and then wwx's snapped from his thoughts by lwj pulling him in and wrapping his arms around him. wwx's breath flies out of him because lwj is hugging him, hugging him so so tightly and lwj's face is buried in his shoulder.

and then the full weight of what's happening finally settles in wwx's mind. he wraps his own arms around lwj and presses his forehead against his shoulder and says with a shuddering breath, in echo of his letter, "Lan Zhan. I really, really like you."

lwj pulls back and takes wwx's face between his hands and says, "I would like to show Wei Ying how much I like him, if he'll let me."

wwx kisses lwj before he can even finish that sentence, and he's so happy that he starts laughing against lwj's lips, and lwj smiles against wwx's.

lwj hangs up wwx's confession letter above his bed.

wwx hangs up lwj's memes above his couch.

I could end this on a sweet note or I could also entertain the idea that now whenever wwx is horny he prints “Sexy time? ” to lwj’s printer, after which he hears frantic knocking on his door ten seconds later. The choice is yours

THE END!

(Lwj during the week his printer wasn’t working: I miss Wei Ying :((

Wwx during the week lwj’s printer wasn’t working, convinced that lwj hates him, so all wwx did was comment the following under every song in a Saddest Love Songs Compilation 2020 video while drunk: