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If (and it's a big *IF*) the VP debate happens tomorrow night, I'll be livetweeting it. Mute this thread if you need to. #VPDebate 
#VPDebate2020 #vpdebates
#VPDebate2020 #vpdebates
Reminder: if the #VPDebate happens,* I'll be livetweeting it here so mute this thread.
*IT SHOULD NOT HAPPEN.
THE ZOMBIES ARE ALREADY LOOSE.
HARRIS. HARRIS. DO NOT DEBATE THE ZOMBIES.
happens,* I'll be livetweeting it here so mute this thread.*IT SHOULD NOT HAPPEN.
THE ZOMBIES ARE ALREADY LOOSE.
HARRIS. HARRIS. DO NOT DEBATE THE ZOMBIES.
Debate is in a little over an hour. Mute or unfollow if you need to.
Caveat: Harris shouldn't have to expose herself to people who obviously don't care if they get her, or any of the many people working the venue, sick. This debate should be held over Zoom.
Caveat: Harris shouldn't have to expose herself to people who obviously don't care if they get her, or any of the many people working the venue, sick. This debate should be held over Zoom.
How-EV-er...since they're obviously charging ahead with their security theater, this is going to be the best debate we'll see.
Pence is a really solid debater. Shitty public speaker, but can twist words around to make them scream. Don't underestimate him.
Then again.....Harris.
Pence is a really solid debater. Shitty public speaker, but can twist words around to make them scream. Don't underestimate him.
Then again.....Harris.
All right, here we go. The #VPDebate . I remember being impressed with Pence's composure and abilities in 2016, so I don't think Harris is going to deliver a savage verbal beating.
Now, an icepick between the ribs?
. I remember being impressed with Pence's composure and abilities in 2016, so I don't think Harris is going to deliver a savage verbal beating.Now, an icepick between the ribs?
Susan Page is moderating. Candidates are seated 12ft apart. https://www.usatoday.com/story/entertainment/tv/2020/10/06/vice-presidential-debate-mike-pence-kamala-harris-moderator-susan-page/3630896001/
Moderator: Coronavirus. Out-of-control murdermachine or airborne landshark that kills your grandparents from the inside out?
Harris: *cracks knuckles* I see we're starting with our dicks out. I appreciate that.
Harris: *cracks knuckles* I see we're starting with our dicks out. I appreciate that.
Moderator: Pence, let's talk about how you've failed at managing the crisis.
Pence: First, I'd like to kill thirty seconds thanking everyone here.
Pence: First, I'd like to kill thirty seconds thanking everyone here.
Pence is rattling off the standard statistics about how and why they haven't actually failed. Harris has a tiny smile and is shaking her head ever so slightly.
Oh, Pence will be so, SO glad they're 12 feet apart by the end of this.
Pence: Let me interrupt you, Ms. Harris.
Harris: Mr. Vice President, I'm speaking.
Pence: Let me interrupt you, Ms. Harris.
Harris: Mr. Vice President, I'm speaking.
Pence is SO GOOD.
I mean, he's the bottom of a shoe that's walked through a sewer, but he shakes his head so very sadly, he keeps talking, so very calmly.
I mean, he's the bottom of a shoe that's walked through a sewer, but he shakes his head so very sadly, he keeps talking, so very calmly.
Moderator: The Red Wedding in the Rose Garden? Everyone's getting sick, yo.
Pence: We trust the American people to make decisions in the best interests of their health.
Harris: Oh? Let's talk about respecting the American people.
Pence: ........ h E L p
Pence: We trust the American people to make decisions in the best interests of their health.
Harris: Oh? Let's talk about respecting the American people.
Pence: ........ h E L p
When Harris runs Pence down, he turns to the moderator and says, "Excuse me, we've talked about this."
Makes me wonder if Trump held the Tantrum Debate as a means of helping Pence appear to stay in control when Harris is holding his head in the toilet.
Makes me wonder if Trump held the Tantrum Debate as a means of helping Pence appear to stay in control when Harris is holding his head in the toilet.
Pence: We're going to have a vaccine soon. "The fact that you continue to undermine confidence...Harris, stop playing politics with people's lives!" [DIRECT QUOTES]
And now he's pulling out the Swine Flu. Dang, he's good.
And now he's pulling out the Swine Flu. Dang, he's good.
Pence also used that answer to dodge the question of what happens when you're the VP of someone who's obviously in terrible health and should not be allowed to stand as POTUS.
Obviously he couldn't answer that question what with *gestures at Trump's Twitter feed.* He's so good.
Obviously he couldn't answer that question what with *gestures at Trump's Twitter feed.* He's so good.
Moderator: Let's talk about Trump and how he's about as healthy as a slug in a warm salt bath.
Pence: Thank you for sending such good wishes to him. Let me thank you for your thoughtfulness. I'll also thank Harris and Biden.
Moderator: You haven't answered--
Pence: THANK YOU.
Pence: Thank you for sending such good wishes to him. Let me thank you for your thoughtfulness. I'll also thank Harris and Biden.
Moderator: You haven't answered--
Pence: THANK YOU.
You can only hide the zombie bite until the beginning of the third act. https://twitter.com/BrieSpangler/status/1314010343597719552
Pence can answer anything by not answering it at all, and managing to drag on that answer over his time.
He's so fuckin' good.
He's so fuckin' good.
Harris' answer that Biden measures the strength and health of the economy based on the strength and the health of the worker is just lovely.
Bonus shoutout for INFRASTRUCTURE WEEK
Bonus shoutout for INFRASTRUCTURE WEEK
This is such a mind-cleanse after that shitshow from last week. It's a return to the lying political bullshit of old! Normalcy! Wordplay! Pauses to jot down notes on a nearby pad!
Thanks, we all hate it. But we hate it...less?
Thanks, we all hate it. But we hate it...less?
MR. VICE PRESIDENT, I'M SPEAKING
Okay, Harris, yank the focus away from this yahoo.
Okay, Harris, yank the focus away from this yahoo.
Now Pence is doing the sad headshake thing.
Pence: "Senator Harris, you're entitled to your own opinion but you aren't entitled to your own facts." [QUOTE]
Harris: "Nice."
Pence: "Senator Harris, you're entitled to your own opinion but you aren't entitled to your own facts." [QUOTE]
Harris: "Nice."
CLIMATE CHANGE QUESTION!!!
Dang, y'all. Four years ago, these questions didn't even show up in major debates.
I mean, it's probably too late and we're fucked, but. Progress???
Dang, y'all. Four years ago, these questions didn't even show up in major debates.
I mean, it's probably too late and we're fucked, but. Progress???
I would certainly enjoy watching Harris gut Pence like a literal fish but she's performing very well without the bloodshed. Statistics. Data. Solid arguments. And consistently linking her replies back to "What Joe believes" and "What Joe wants to do."
Moderator: Pence, do you believe the climate poses an existential threat?
Pence: Biden is about to raise your taxes.
Pence: Biden is about to raise your taxes.
Pence just said that Harris was a sponsor of the original Green New Deal, and that the current Biden/Harris climate language is similar in scope and purpose to GND.
Thank you for that excellent marketing blurb for everybody in my generation and younger.
Thank you for that excellent marketing blurb for everybody in my generation and younger.
We're in the part of the debate in which the moderator's questions are ignored and Pence and Harris simply sidestep to circle back and beat at each other for what they said in the last segment.
The moderator's asking good questions but WOOOOO
The moderator's asking good questions but WOOOOO
Harris and Pence are both very good at grabbing words and (A) using them to defend their respective bosses; and (B) bludgeoning them with facts and stats.
They've also both got the sad headshake down.
They've also both got the sad headshake down.
I don't know much about the K. Mueller case but Pence using her murder as a lengthy talking point is distasteful.
Harris just apologized to her parents.
Harris just apologized to her parents.
CUT
MIKE'S
MIC
MIKE'S
MIC
Moderator: Last question. Supreme Court. Good, bad, or made of bugs? Specifically, Roe V. Wade. Pence? Please respond.
Pence: Let's talk about terrorism, specifically the murder of an Iranian general.
Pence: Let's talk about terrorism, specifically the murder of an Iranian general.
He did haul it back to the original question, but dumped 60 seconds into an unrelated "terrorism" response, and then attacked Harris and Biden for their hatred of the nominee and religion in general.
She's bringing the issues back to COVID, health care, and Trump's failures on the pandemic, and I just came a little.
Oh hi Pence lemme all-caps at you...
YOU ALLOWED MORE THAN 200k PEOPLE TO DIE
YOU ARE KEEPING MEN, WOMEN, AND CHILDREN IN CAGES
YOU CANNOT ARGUE "THE SANCTITY OF LIFE" YOU EMPTY PRINTER CARTRIDGE OF A HUMAN
YOU ALLOWED MORE THAN 200k PEOPLE TO DIE
YOU ARE KEEPING MEN, WOMEN, AND CHILDREN IN CAGES
YOU CANNOT ARGUE "THE SANCTITY OF LIFE" YOU EMPTY PRINTER CARTRIDGE OF A HUMAN
hang on folks, Harris just tented her chin on her hands.
"Would you like to talk about packing the courts? Because I'm going to talk about packing the courts."
"Would you like to talk about packing the courts? Because I'm going to talk about packing the courts."
I strongly doubt Pence is going to give a shoutout to the Proud Boys but if it's going to happen, it's going to happen in this section of questioning.
Pence is such a glorious parody of a politician. It's heartbreaking that he couldn't lose in 2016 and live out his dreams as a well-paid panelist on FOX.
THE FLY IS STILL ON MIKE PENCE'S HEAD
Okay it's gone now but if Harris snatches that thing out of the air and flings it back at him, I'm shifting a full degree on Kinsey Scale.
...Pence just used the "Trump can't be racist because he has Black friends" except about his kids and that's disgusting.
Wrap this up, folks. Pence can't ignore his burgeoning viral load much longer.
Oh ffs he's referring to Russian anti-American propaganda. What a jackass.
Moderator reads sniffling, sighing "Why can't we all get along?" question.
Pence is wringing his hands about polarization and common love. I really want someone to register their disagreement with a shoe.
Pence is wringing his hands about polarization and common love. I really want someone to register their disagreement with a shoe.
Really wanted Harris to answer the same question with, "Well, the jackass twelve feet away from me doesn't think I'm a real person so let's start there," but she just went with Uncle Joe Loves Us All.
Debate's over. Naptimes for all.
Debate's over. Naptimes for all.
