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1. Welcome to the White House Daily Shadow Briefing. While @PressSec is out, we wish her a speedy recovery, the Shadow Briefing will step up out of our civic duty to keep the American public informed. Let me start with a brief opening statement on the President's health
2. The President is in pretty bad shape. That walk up the steps to the Truman balcony really took it out of him. You could see him laboring to breath. But he soldiered on like the true warrior he is to not only get the shot for the commercial but to bravely do a second take
3. despite all his physical limitations. The President had a normal day today, he raged tweeted for most of the morning and watched Cable TV for the afternoon. So let's get to questions. Q. Why has the White House withheld important health information from the American people.
4. Because the news is all pretty bad. If you think he looked bad last night, you should have seen him once the makeup came off. The President doesn't want any bad news put out and his drs went right along with that. Q. Can you be a little more forthcoming? A. Of course i can.
5. Let me start with a little pro-tip--any question you guys had over the last few days is confirmation that the President has it. Just use that rule and you'll understand where things stand. Q. So does the President have pneumonia. A. Of course he does. If he didn't Dr. Daffy
6. told you that. Q. Does the President have significant lung damage? A. Follow me here, if Dr. Daffy avoided the question that means he has lung damage. Q. Why were the doctors so aggressive with the treatment? A. Because he was much sicker than we let on. And he was sicker
7. longer. Q So, when was his last negative test? A. Sometime in May. He didn't like it so the doctors stopped it even though @PressSec said he was tested every day, sometimes multiple times a day. That's bad @PressSec you shouldn't lie to the press. Q. So was he covid positive
8. at the debate? A. We assume so, but we have no real idea since we weren't testing him. Does it matter? Q. Don't you think you should have told the Biden's sooner about the Covid test? A. Nah, he's got a tv and a twitter account. This is war.
9. Q. There are reports that the WH is not doing contact tracing even though the hosted a superspreader event. Why is that? A. Because then people would know how bad it really is. Now some people may die and stuff because we didn't say anything, but the President thinks if he
10. takes care of himself, everyone else is on their own. It's sort of trickle down virus. Q. Can you explain what the President was trying to accomplish with his photo-op at the WH last night? A. I wish i knew. It was ridiculous spectacle that made him look really foolish.
11. In fact, the President got a call from Mike Dukakis today thanking him for replacing him as the most ridiculous political photo op of all time. The President seemed pleased, but that could just be the steroids. Q. Speaking of steroids, is anyone concerned that the side
12. effects of the drug, manic, aggressive, paranoid might influence the President's ability to make decisions? A. Not at all, he exhibits all of those symptoms even when he's not on the drug. Do you follow him on Twitter? Q. Is there any truth to the reports that POTUS is
13. overruling the FDA on approving a vaccine? A. That's the plan. I'll let you know if that changes. Q. Is that safe? A. Of course not, use common sense. Q. Why did the President break off talks with Congress on the stimulus bill. A. That's a good question. First, he doesn't
14. care about anyone who is suffering. Second, he pretty much knows he's going to lose. So he wants to saddle Biden with a failing economy that he can criticize daily on his new Trump News Network. Q. Who does the President owe $421 million to? A. Pretty evenly split between
15. Russia and China. That's why he won't criticize Russia and he gave away the story to China in the trade talks. Did you see last month was the largest trade deficit in 14 years, that ought to buy him a little more time on that debt. Q. On his taxes, how could he pay only $750
16. two years in a row? A. Simple, he cheated, he committed tax fraud. Let's start with the little stuff. NBC paid for all his hairdresser costs. Yet he claimed $70k..that's fraud. He had a sweetheart deal with his sweetheart, Ivanka, where the both committed fraud.
17. the big stuff was underestimating his assets to the IRS and overestimating them to banks to get more loans. That's a big no no. Getting a $11 million refund was kind of a tell wasn't it? Q. Is it safe to work in the White House right now? A. No, why do you ask?
18. Q. Why hasn't @vp self isolated given he was exposed and continuity of government issues. A. The President doesn't care what the VP does. He just wishes he had dumped him before the convention. Q. Did the President write off his payment to Stormy Daniels and i have a follow
19. A. Of course he did. Don't all rich people write off their hush money payments to adult movie stars? Q. Did the President say his encounter with Ms. Daniels was worth the 130k. A. Can't answer that because of Hippa rules. I'm sure you understand. I think i've done quite
20 damage for one afternoon. We'll see you here tomorrow and will continue to brief you on all the things the WH is hiding.
