May fuck around and rank the Von Trapp children.

Okay, let’s do this.

7. Friedrich Von Trapp

He bit Gretl’s finger. That’s all you need to know.

[the girls agree]

6. Liesl von Trapp

Stalking a Nazi. Need I go on?

5. Louisa von Trapp

The only thing she does in the entire film is pretend she’s Brigitta.

(This is also the only thing that gave her the advantage over Liesl because, let’s be honest, who doesn’t want to be Brigitta?)

4. Marta von Trapp

Marta is going to be seven on Tuesday. She’d like a pink parasol and some character development.

3. Gretl von Trapp

The youngest von Trapp, she is the first to like Maria and the last to go to bed. Also, the absolute cutest.

2. Kurt von Trapp

He’s incorrigible. He’s funny. And he knows it. God bless Kurt.

1. Brigitta von Trapp

There’s a reason she gets her own entrance. Smart, honest and literate, Brigitta is von Trapp children goals.

And there you have it!

Oh, and in case you forgot, Friedrich still sucks.

[fin]

Seriously. God bless Kurt.