hey cis ppl: dont refer to nonbinary people as enbies, don’t call us they/thems, dont ever fucking refer to us as “enbabies” or “themsies”. dont ever make jokes about our gender identity either. it’s transphobic. here’s a thread addressing why all of this is disrespectful.

disclaimer: i will be using the term “transphobia” to refer to the disrespect / discrimination of nonbinary people because we are considered trans since we dont identify with our agab and the term “enbyphobic” makes some nonbinary people uncomfortable.

1) the term “enbies” should NEVER be used to refer to nonbinary people as a whole. not every nonbinary person is comfortable with the term “enby”. some find it infantilizing or just don’t like it. in fact dont even say “enby” if you arent nonbinary, it’s OUR term.

2) calling us they/thems is wrong for multiple reasons. not all nonbinary people use they/them. some use he/him, she/her, neopronouns or any pronouns. assuming we all use they/them is forcing us into a box and trying to make nonbinary a “third gender”, which it is not.

3) the terms “enbabies” & “themsies” ... these are INCREDIBLY infantilizing which is insulting. it makes me feel like you see me as childlike for my gender identity. it makes me feel like you see my identity as smth “cute” or “quirky”. please NEVER use these terms. it’s so rude

our gender is not something “cute”, it’s not an aesthetic. when you refer to us with terms like “enbabies” it almost feels as if you’re treating us like pets. it’s very uncomfortable and insulting. do not ever, and i mean EVER, use those terms to refer to nonbinary people.

4) and making jokes about our gender identity when you’re cis ... that is just transphobic. you don’t understand our experiences with gender so you don’t get to make jokes abt it, it’s disrespectful and invalidating. our identity should never be the punchline of your joke.

respect nonbinary people. respect the terms we’re comfortable with. realize that not all of us go by they/them, not all of us are completely androgynous. don’t baby us. don’t make jokes abt our gender. learn how to properly respect nonbinary people or don’t talk about us at all.

another thing that someone in the replies brought up: DONT CALL US THEYDIES AND GENTLETHEYS, because again not all of us use they/them and not all of us are comfortable with these terms being used for us.

for the cis people who wanna know what they should call us: just call us nonbinary people. it’s what we are and it’s not offensive bc it’s our identity. “nb” can be okay under certain context, but it also means non black, so it can be confusing. “nonbinary people” is best.