Miscarriage: Thread

I first had a miscarriage in 2016. It hurt, but not so much like this recent one. Maybe because I'm older now. I don't know....

I'm not one to go into full details of how my most depressing situations happen, but listen, a miscarriage is the worst thing

When a miscarriage happens, no matter how many months the pregnancy was, you feel it.

Imagine having something grow inside you ... Taking the mumbwa, all these pills, every fucking day.

And the baby just decides to get out at five months....five fucking months! And this last pregnancy did something ridiculous, it got out when we'd gone for antenatal...

The doctor (Doctor Victor) of Abii clinic had been looking out for me and treating me. He fought very hard.. he wanted me to have this baby. God bless him

But it got out.
Anyway, let me not over share about that.

You don't just get over this. It takes days. It takes time. You might not even ever get over it. It's traumatising

I'm still traumatized. I get sad, I get depressed. I have people I can call when I'm depressed. And whenever I call them, they know exactly what's depressing me.... before I even tell them.

Have friends. Talk to them. But in your heart, also try to convince yourself that you are fighting this. Please. It's not easy, it's very traumatising. No one wants to lose a child, I understand you very well. Because I've been in your shoes twice.

No one should ask you to grieve how they want. Drink the alcohol. Kick ass. Your miscarriages don't define you. Grieve how you best know.
Get personal people you can talk to. Therapists don't even work for us. The pain is beyond. Talk to someone that you think understands you

The end!

If you want full details, kindly dm and we share phone numbers. I want to talk to all of you. It's fine. It will be fine.

Again: I'm sorry If this thread didn't help... But I want you to know that you are loved. You are beautiful. You are good! I have the best therapist's number, If you need it.

If I may add: don't ever let anyone be it your in-laws, make you feel like you are less of a person, just because you are miscarrying.
Don't allow it!

Also I get this fear, that I will never give birth... Of course I know the options, adoption and surrogacy...
But, hear me please, I just want to carry this baby until it's birth. I will think of other options after that. Don't blame me for getting pregnant, eeh eeh

Sometimes I want to share what I'm exactly thinking about this whole thing, but I can't. My fears are many. I don't want to over open up publicly... Because people on social media don't care, they will use your situation against you