love all parts of survivors. the parts that wake up with nightmares. the vengeful parts. the parts of us that are undone. the burnt out parts. the parts not suited for inspiration porn. the parts with intrusive and uncontrollable thoughts. all of it.

I am trying really hard to not hate these parts of myself. Sometimes I see survivors who’ve seemingly made miraculous recoveries, and sometimes I feel stuck and little and so unstable compared to them.

(tw for rape & sexual abuse mention) but it needs to be understood that rape & sexual abuse & sexual trauma affect parts of yourself you didn’t even know could hurt. it sends shockwaves through your entire body & mind. “recovery” is a lifetime effort

so there never should be shame surrounding where I am at, or where you are at, because it is not a competition, nor is healing about how well you live up to colonial ableist terms of “normalcy” after you’ve experienced the worst thing ever

& we deserve love & patience at every moment