Holy shit yes.

The constant feedback I got from my parents, teachers etc. was that when I didn& #39;t bring home an A+, it was because I was lazy. Because "I could do better". And I believed them. Because I knew that if the circumstances where right, I COULD. https://twitter.com/blkgirllostkeys/status/1170069211600838656">https://twitter.com/blkgirllo...

And so in my head, I just became convinced that I am an incredibly lazy person. I just accepted that at an early age and felt ashamed of it ever since. I was just not hard working enough. Just too lazy. Too comfortable.

I was wasting my potential.

I would spend 5h sitting at my desk in the afternoon, because that& #39;s how long it took to get the 20 min of menial, boring homework done that posed absolutely no intellectual challenge to me and didn& #39;t teach me anything I didn& #39;t already know.

I would not "study" in the "learning by heart" sense, bring home an A- and be asked why I didn& #39;t care. Why I didn& #39;t do better. Why I didn& #39;t "apply myself". Cause we all knew, that technically, I was capable of an A+. So I felt guilty and frustrated with myself. I felt ashamed.

To this day I often tell myself I am being lazy. Just not motivated enough. Too distracted. Like I am "wasting my potential".

The most striking part was always languages. I speak 4 languages fluently, 3 of those on basically native speaker levels. English is my 3rd language.

But I am not capable of learning a language from books in school. I need to be immersed in it.

After 4 years of French in high school, I was barely capable of introducing myself, bringing home mostly Cs. After 10 months in Paris, I was one of the better students in one of the most competitive high schools in Paris.