I honestly don't even know what resources I could ask for. Maybe it's because I'm relatively "high functioning" (meaning I can, for at least short periods, hide who I am enough to interact with neurotypicals), but like...what could anyone even DO to support my neurodivergence? https://twitter.com/MxOolong/status/1312505149407911937

There are no drugs for autism that I know of. There's an entire internet full of data on Autism, and...I'm autistic. If I decide I want to know something, I will learn more about it than any book, or pamphlet, or support worker could possibly tell me about.

I guess maybe it's possible some places have financial support for autistic, but I've never heard of anything like that where I am. In fact, I spend a significant portion of my income trying to help others like me BECAUSE there aren't any supports available for them.

The idea that somehow adult autistics are siphoning resources from kids is laughable. There ARE no resources to speak of. And the majority of what people want from their "autistic children's resources" is for their children to be OBEDIENT, and that's not on the kid.

If what you want from autistics is obedience - which seems to be all ANYONE wants from any neurodivergent - then you, as the person demanding obedience, need to learn how to interact with us. Believe it or not, we WANT to be obedient. We just have certain needs that must be met.

1) Tell us the rules, in their entirety. NO unspoken rules. We follow rules we are aware of. Rigidly.
2) Don't lie, dissemble, or engage in hypocrisy. Autistics do very poorly with this.
3) Don't expect eye contact. Seriously. Predators stare you in the eyes. WTF.

4) Tell us WHY. The why behind things is very, VERY important.
5) Tell us where to find the resources you expect us to use to do a job. Remember: we don't pick up on subtleties very well, and suck out loud at "tribal knowledge". We need resources spelled out explicitly.

There are other rules, and they vary in both what the rules are and their level of importance based on the individual, but if you can follow the above rules you should be able to get along fine with most autistics, young or old. I do not understand what is so hard about that.

But that isn't what people want. They want demure obedience coupled with, effectively, telepathy. Except we also need to know when not to talk about things that are true, but which you don't want talked about, because apparently that's upsetting, but you won't tell us it is.

I don't know what "resources" can help with that. You can't magically change autistics. You can TORTURE us by forcing us to behave in ways that are completely against our nature. You can abuse us by demanding we repress ourselves our whole lives. But CHANGE us?

No.

I know there are autistics with way - WAY - more severe problems than I will ever have. Or be able to handle as a caregiver. People who have massive sensory processing issues, or debilitating social deficits, but...those are people who will need full time caregivers FOREVER.

I don't see how adult austistics who are capable of integrating into neurotypical society enough to hold a job/pay rent/etc are in any way taking resources from those people who can't do this. Or why we, as a society, can't provide for the small % of our population that needs it.

But it's worth bearing in mind that when you see a neurodivergent being "functional" it means that they are suppressing part of themselves - often at great cost - just so you won't bully them. So they can perform the interactions needed to survive.

What's needed isn't more "resources" to help neurodivergents conform to the zeitgeist's ideals of how people should behave.

What's need is just being less horrible to one another so that we can accept the many variations in how people experience and interact with the world.