Ok so yall... I slid ina DM & asked this dude out.. told him I was interested.

He seemed flattered. Okaaaayyyyy bet. I guess
ISSA THREAD

We made plans for dinner. 7:30p. He checked in TWICE through out the day to make sure we was still on.

Once in the morning & around 2-3p.. the 2nd time he changed the time to 8p. Thas coo wit me

I get ready.. Usually im the type to hit you before I leave or I aint leaving lmfaaoooo.
Buuut i leave anyways. Made it at 7:58p

I text him & tell him I made it. No reply. 3 mins later I text “Are you here?” No reply. So im like okay damn... wtf.

I called & he answered & said “ hey sorry Im running late! Leaving the house now.. I stay 10mins from the restaurant so I wont be long. I apologize!”

At 8:25p im like hmmm... BUT.. i be “fashionably late” here and there. I guess chile (while waiting It was a FINE ASS man walking outa Buffalo Wild Wings chilewe locked eyes & smiled hard asf but.. I decided to act right)
At 8:33p he texts me & said “Parking!”

Ok bet. He called & said Ima walk in & put our names down. walk up. Im like ok.. I fix my gloss... got out & seen him coming out. (FINE AS MF WINE yall. Jesus. Haircut crispy asf Thats where his ass was I bet lmfaaooo)
They said the wait was 1hr 20min.

We look at eachother.. smiling. We hugged. He said “you so gorgeous! I thought this was a joke when you hit me up!” Lmfaaooo maaaaann.

I didnt wanna wait an hr plus... so we went around the corner to another place.

We took our own cars & went around the corner...waited like 20min& sat at the bar. Conversation was good. We started talking about kids (forgot hope it came up) he asked did I have some. I said yes... 1.
He said “Maaan all my friends have atleast 1! I need to get started!”

He asked did I want more kids... start asking about my life as a mom.. drinks flowing.. (this nigga gettin DRUNK) I order... he order.. (his food looked better)
He ordering drink after drink... im like oh you turnt

I can tell he started feelin the liquor

Ok I’m back yall intermission cuz life but here we go...

So after he was CLEARLY tipsy.. prob drunk lmfaoooo idk.. he started gettin a lil touchy feely.. I aint trippin..

But then he started asking me about making a baby in my ear after his board exams over (residency/med student) I’m laughing it off all fake lmfaooo

Im like.. playing it off fake giggling but at the same time I’m like “this mf tipsy lol don’t pay him no mind”. He kept saying shit about a baby so im like “Dude no”.

& he said “Damn what you ask me out for then?”

I told him “cuz I was attracted to you”. (Thought it was obvious).

He said “Ooooo So you dont wanna slut me out? You gon Atleast let me eat it?” Yall what????? Who says this?? Ona first date without equal energy

Fast forward... the bill came & I grab it (I asked him out). He snatched it & said “Naw thats impolite. You ain’t bout to tell all yo friends I made you pay. Nice try.” lmfaaaoooo huh???

He paid. We got up.. choppin it up as he walked me to my car.

We sure saying our goodbyes (handsy AS FUCK)... he hugged me tight asf & asked when would he see me again. He eyeing me for a kiss but I’m avoiding it. Thats when he damn near stuck his tongue down my throat!!! Im like “ DUDE!!!!”

He gon say “so this aint why you asked me out?”

He kept begging to eat it & “put the tip in” talking bout my ovulation & babies like... can you fucking chill???

Vibe was already off cuz during dinner I ordered catfish tacos & he kept referring to my “cat he wanna eat” & allat.

He finally took them paws down & Gave me ANOTHER kiss bye saying “your skin so soft” & “i cant stop holding you” nigga just go home

He wanted to schedule another date but.. I kept avoiding. Nigga kept kissing me I had to pull away lmfaaaooooo no

He also asked could he put his head under my dress & eat it NOOOOOOOOO
I made sure he walked to his car safely.

He was good company & fine but yall... no. He doing babymama auditions

It just aint for me. I wont be back
He seemed koo but like.... he wanted some quick fertile pussy...I aint down.

thanks for listening yall

But why I always find the weird ones I mean I guess wanting a baby rn aint weird we in our 30s... i even talk about a baby girl but..... baby talk aint the first thing I go for on a first date.

No. Ima pass FUCK.