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Trying to figure out how to get my life in any kind of order lately. I am in a privileged position right now to have the time to.
Where do I start?
Where do I start?
I keep having moments of revelation that I think will help me. Sometimes, they stick, a little, and it helps the next time I break down -- because it's a cycle.
I used to pride myself on being able to at least fake what I needed to fake at the time.
I used to pride myself on being able to at least fake what I needed to fake at the time.
I haven't had a proper schedule since we moved, of course. But I stopped writing in late 2018 and I haven't gotten it back. That, I think, is a big backbone to my insecurity.
It used to define me. I used to love it. I don't even write for money, or even to post. I just did it.
It used to define me. I used to love it. I don't even write for money, or even to post. I just did it.
I had a very bad medication breakdown I've mentioned, but it's under control now. I'll be seeing a psych soon. I have a few projects I can do when I'm focused. So I think it's not that I can't create a schedule.
I just don't know how to enforce it.
I just don't know how to enforce it.
... However, I did just find a job opening for a company that is actually 100% up my alley, and I qualify for it via experience even if I don't have a Master's/PhD, with a portfolio to show them of my old and recent projects.
It made me feel excited as hell. HMM.
It made me feel excited as hell. HMM.
Also, I think part of my issue is that I have been neglecting my spirituality and my old Work.
I do live in a prime area for my particular kind of Work, too. I am absolutely in my element. I can feel it here, the lightness thinking of reaching out and doing community work, too.
I do live in a prime area for my particular kind of Work, too. I am absolutely in my element. I can feel it here, the lightness thinking of reaching out and doing community work, too.
Talking out loud and *not* self-flagellating seems to be helping me, suddenly. Thank you if you are reading this thread. It's helping.
