Everytime someone like this tweet I will tell a fact about myself.

1. https://twitter.com/GeraldJA3/status/1311370368712491008?s=20

2. Jacked off with a Water bottle once. That drip be flowing on the H20 yessir.

3. One time on 2019 the shower at the hotel is used by all my male friends so I pretty much went full naked and wash myself in the Public cryotherapy Jacuzzi bath tub praying no one sees me

4. I once nearly went to jail for false rape accusation and false domestic abuse accusation by a parents at a class.

5. I am related to an AS Roma/Intermilan Soccer player

6. I once tried to suck my own dick by pushing my whole ass and erect my dick to the fullest and got the tip innit. Shits hard and it isn't really worth it even I managed to.

7. One time I was so down bad bored on Church but the new Pianist is a female that's so cute and hot that on the ministry I went to the toilet three times jacking off to it.

8. My dog was so detrimentally horny that when I was doing Yoga at 3rd drake this bitch tryna hump my ass.

9. I once cried on 2014 because I can't go to a One Direction fan because our car tire exploded. The radio was playing a One Directions song, Night Changes and I was bawling inside the car.

10. I hated my teacher so much one time I made that wrinkly asshole tsunami surviving ass victim cried in front of my parents and squat tugging my leg like lmfao fuck you bitch no sympathy for U

11. I have three murder attempts under my belt

yeah I went 3 - 0 ffs

12. One time on elementary the teacher asked if anyone knows how to wash their ass on the toilet and I told her that I would insert my finger to my asshole and take all the shit out with the pointer

13. Talking about washing my ass I would insert jet washer to my asshole and let it FWOOSH all the shit out yessirskii

14. I have an aunt that pretty much already ate almost every animal in existence from monkeys to bats to every weird shit for research on tribals. Them mfs will crack a monkeys head alive and slurp the blood of the brain while that mf still alive and screaming brah.

15. The first time I ejaculated, I tasted my own cum.

16. The best experience is perhaps one time when one friend of mine that is a girl fell on the floor as I lay into one and farted in front of my face. That shit smell glorious.

17. Back then I would bite my friends hair in classroom without them realizing and it would just be a vibe bro. Idk tf was with me but shits happen as an enjoyment for me 2 years ago.

18. One time I nearly asked this hot new teacher to kiss me at the laboratory since it's only us both but I am glad I never did because fuck this stupid ass ho I hate her now.

19. Crashed with a speeding motorcycle once. God said Imma built this mf different because somehow the motorcycle was damaged and the guy was injured but not me although my leg was crashed.

20. I have an uncle who used to smuggle drugs like Young Thug's lyric

'I hide that crack in my crack'

21. So uh...yeah me and my classmates be so horny that we wrote pornographic smutfics of our own classmates and teachers

and guess what? from number one and my friends be making a smutfic of me sucking a dick ffs

22. Once told to my biggest enemy

"Fuck you. This is why God gave your mother cancer on 2001."

surprise surprise that is where our friendship restart.

23. If anyone tried to touch my brother, I will snap their neck. Anyone try to shit talk my brother, I will spit their face. I am a fucking brother's keeper.

24. One time I really listen to Hamilton and played a Steven Universe song just to impress this girl and write a really long ass text for her I was this down bad

25. I got rejected by her.

26. I was supposed to be dead but the chances of me surviving back then was 10% survival rate and 90% failure but my father fast and prayed and for some reason instead of complaining prayed for the doctors to and bam Im born-

27.

-with retardness because of that it took me years to pass through kindergarten bruh. Doctor said I would be antisocial for my retardness but HAHA LOOK AT ME NOW BITCH. I BE MAKING FRIENDS AND DELIVER.