I've seen two people discussing inappropriate teaching moments from peers in as many days so I want to talk about what is and is not appropriate when it comes to teaching.

By teaching I mean:
- when we explain something without being asked,
- when we test whether someone knows something,
- when we correct someone because they misspoke even though we understood them,
- etc

I understand that this might come from a place of wanting to help, however, when this happens inappropriately it is at best condescending and at worst actively harmful.

When is it appropriate to teach someone?

It is _only_ appropriate to teach someone if we have established a teaching relationship with that person. This might be through a mentor / coaching program at work, or just a friend who would like help learning something we know.

Importantly, the person we are going to teach must have sought that relationship, and they must be empowered to end that relationship when they no longer want it.

When is it inappropriate to teach someone?

Even if we have established this relationship, there is a time and place for it. We should not be correcting or testing someone in front of other people. Teaching must be constructive, safe and sought.

How do we establish a teaching relationship?

We can offer but, again, only if appropriate. If someone wants to learn something, we can offer to help.

That person may turn us down, and thats ok.

We may start teaching someone and they may ask to break from that, that's ok too.

I recommend creating a mentoring agreement. Templates for this can be found online. It may seem constrictive but it helps set boundaries and make sure both parties are safe and comfortable.

I hope this thread helps people build constructive and beneficial relationships.

However, while I have mentored, coached, been mentored and been coached, I am not a authority on the topic. These are my experiences, and I am happy for people to post feedback on this thread.