Share your wicked LDC orals stories

Entered the family panel and all went well until I was asked the requirements and steps to apply for grant of probate.

I froze.

Then I started sweating..

I was asked why I was sweating? I told the panel I have hyperhidrosis.

They burst out laughing and told me to go...

I think I had the hardest question in criminal proceedings to date.

Qn: You are a policeman called to Karamoja. Tourists are arrested with gold, ivory, oil & forged agreements with the M7's signature.

You are tasked to collect evidence & send them to the relevant offices

pending trial..... proceed.

Me: I first take the ivory to Uganda Wildlife Authority.

Panelist: why?

Me: because we want to test and confirm that the ivory is from elephants in Uganda

*Entire panel bursts out in laughter*

I looked on like:

Me: for the oil, you take it to Ministry of Energy

Panelist: why

Me: to confirm that the oil is from Lake Albert

Entire panel bursts out in laughter again

Then i change my answer and say I'll take the oil to a government chemist

Then they are like

Me: for forged signatures, I take to government handwriting expert in Wandegeya

Panel: yes go on

In my mind:

Panel: do you have anything else to add.

Me: no

Panel: OK sir, you are dismissed and free to go

Me: