Presidential Debate time!

(I'm going to tag each tweet in this thread #AliceWatchesTheDebate for blacklisting purposes and so that no-one gets confused and mistakes anything I say for Claire)

I've got my popcorn ready!

it occurs to me suddenly that I have gone 4 years successfully never having heard the President speak out loud (I read the news online rather than watching on tv) and so have no idea what his actual voice sounds like

#AliceWatchesTheDebate

"these two old white guys really don't like each other"

enjoying the BBC's coverage so far, they sure know how to distill the whole race down to its essentials

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so far I prefer Biden's tie, but I don't really like either tie much

why is the President arguing with the moderator, is this supposed to happen

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I don't know anything about this moderator guy, but he uses the word 'sir' to Trump in exactly the same way I do when using it in my Customer Service Voice on really childish men

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"Would you shut up, man" sure is a thing the President of the United States just said in a debate

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wait...or was that Biden?? Darn, if I don't pay attention to the screen, I really can't tell their voices apart!

either way, WILD debate so far, really intelligent discourse!

#AliceWatchesTheDebate

me wishing one of these candidates was a woman or at least from like...Texas or something so I could tell their voices apart more easily, especially when they're talking over each other

I have this problem with American podcasts too

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seeing the chart of which countries have the most Covid deaths and the UK solidly on there above even the US, we love to see it

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I had to go clean out the cat's litter box for a minute, but I'm back and these two old white guys are still arguing with each other, so I don't think I missed much

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'Covid lockdowns are bad because they will lead to more divorce' is a fascinating take that I'm not quite sure what to make of

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from what I can tell they are now on 'Taxes: should I personally pay them?' which feels very American, this is the kind of discourse I'm here for

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"China ate your lunch" is my personal new favourite quote from this debate so far, no idea what it means even in context, but it's great

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I can't help feeling that this debate would be going a lot better if the moderator had an option to just press mute on the microphones when needed so they'd stop talking over each other all the bastard time, instead of just having to yell over both of 'em

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this last segment has been the most easy to follow for me as an outsider, but it sure is depressing

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Biden saying he was proud of his son actually got me a little bit, that was nice, not really relevant to anything but probably the warmest I've felt towards him so far

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Trump: "We have crystal clear air"
Me, who has seen a lot of photos of the sky, or lack thereof, posted by my American pals on social media recently: ??

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why are they talking about how expensive cars are, this feels like a parody of what an American debate would be about

although no-one has mentioned guns yet!

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I'm not sure who's winning this thing, but I sure have been putting my head in my hands and groaning a lot

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I'm not sure this orange man is entirely on the the up and up

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this is making me feel slightly better about voting in the UK, at least when we make stupid ass decisions as a country we know it's solidly our own fault for being idiots, you generally don't have to worry much about the voting process itself

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"moderated...kind of...by Chris Wallace"

the BBC coming in clutch with the commentary again

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"it sounds like you're being yelled at by all the men you've ever had an argument with"

it's such a relief to hear this post-debate commentary from these BBC bods, their utterly baffled reactions are very reassuring

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in conclusion, my main take-away from tonight's debate was that the moderator should be armed with a water pistol

#AliceWatchesTheDebate

I was gonna go to sleep after this but I'm going to be honest with you guys; I'm way too wired and could really use half a bottle of wine and some Chinese food

shockingly, nowhere will deliver at 3:57am on a Wednesday morning so I may just have to settle for the wine

goodnight!