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I don& #39;t want to be treated "as a woman". I& #39;m not a simile for a woman. I& #39;m not a metaphorical woman.
I& #39;m a woman.
I& #39;m a woman.
I& #39;m both not "choosing to be a woman" nor do I regret being a woman. I was taught it wasn& #39;t okay to be a woman, and so I tried so hard for decades to not be. I tried to be who they told me I was supposed to be. I failed.
Some say it& #39;s cisnormative of me to say my womanhood is innate, but tough tiddy. I tried to not be a woman, not because I don& #39;t want to be but because they made me afraid of being a woman.
But I couldn& #39;t make the womanhood go away like they wanted me to.
But I couldn& #39;t make the womanhood go away like they wanted me to.
I& #39;ll call that innate, thanks. I don& #39;t expect everyone& #39;s gender has to be innate, but mine is.
Does that mean I think that "woman" is a fixed, universal type? No, it& #39;s a category society uses.
Does that mean I think that "woman" is a fixed, universal type? No, it& #39;s a category society uses.
But I know that the category is one that I& #39;m a part of, and that trying to divorce myself from that category was an endeavor that I undertook for 4 decades, and I put more skill into that than most cis people have to marshal for anything in their lives, and I still failed.
And I& #39;m *glad* I failed. I wish I& #39;d been able to see earlier that the endeavor was harmful and doomed to failure, and that the alternative, of accepting who I am, is so much better.
GCs like to go on about "why say you& #39;re a woman when you should be proud to be trans?" I& #39;m proud of being a woman, female from birth and fuck-you-very-much if saying so makes me "cisnormative" in your disapproving eyes, AND I& #39;m proud of being trans.
