I think there are lots of people who've felt lonely in new ways during lockdown. Gaps in support networks seemed wider and deeper and disparity of starting points are really vivid. And, while I'm still navigating those feelings myself I also feel it's important for people to say.

While and when they can. I think there is huge tendency towards 'we can get a positive out of a negative' but sometimes it's necessary and important to say there might not be one, but that it's worth continuing anyway.

It would be very easy for many people to fall through the gaps, to feel unseen or unimportant or do things like withdraw further as evidence of the lonliness being a permanent state. We have been taught to measure our value in who we are important to and how often it is shown.

Many people take it for granted that they share a home with other adults who love them, or are part of family or friendship groups or work groups. But there are lots of people not in these situations. Some people don't hear from anyone for days or more. Some people *are* alone.

And it's not something they can positive think their way out of, nor should they. It's okay to say you are alone or lonely or don't have the support it might take to have an easier life. But lonliness is labelled like its a personal shame. Something to not admit or grow out of.

So tempting to say 'Hobby yourself out of lonliness! Learn about yourself! True happiness comes from within!' But. I'm not sure how helpful these things are in dealing with the lonliness the current situation has exacerbated. Sure. They help. But.

Being seen or noticed or shown care. Because you're you. Those things carry and lift people. A lack of it, burrows deep. We have this thing we believe: be nice and you'll be personally rewarded. It might be time to say... that's not always true.

But be nice anyway. Pass on good. The gleaming. The glimmer. But. Nobody should ever apologise for feeling lonely as though it's a personal failing, to feel alone. To feel branches growing outwards in case they might find other branches, but, not.

And give yourself a gentle touch to say, you're still here. Just there. Even if nobody sees you.

An adendum. You can feel lonely and be lonely while at the same time being upbeat and smiley and loving so many aspects of your life. We don't talk about lonliness and what it is and how it looks enough. It can look like anything from the outside.

Ironically, my life is full of joys and I am content in that I see its value. On a day to day basis I am one of happiest people you could meet. So. Feel all the stuff. Don't select the highlights. They're not the bits that bring true connection when they're on their own.