As a Nigerian kid, the first step to achieving your freedom is rebelling against your parents unapologetically. Wage war continuously until you break them.

As soon as one battle was finished, I would start another one. At some point the cost of waging war with you outweighs just letting you be. You win when they throw up the white flag from exhaustion.

It might come as a shock to some of you but I used to be the kid parents would tell their kids to emulate. "Why can't you be more like Eche?"

I knew the whole time I was terrorist but I needed to get to America first before I showed my real face.

As soon as that Air France flight landed in the U.S.

I told myself it was time to

I went from being bible quiz champion for the church to letting my parents know I couldn't be Christian anymore.

Every other day was like playing Whot card game. I was hitting them with new cards.

Pick 2. Pick 3. General market. Last card. Checkup.

An Igbo acquaintance told me he couldn't marry his Yoruba girlfriend because his parents did not approve.

I couldn't relate. Because when you choose to rebel you become comfortable with your parents disapproval. You won't die

A lot of Nigerian parents are fine with you spending the majority of your life performing.
You spend all that time performing and you can't even win an Oscar. Tragic

"wage war continuously".

The reason is because some Nigerian parents love to feign ignorance or forgetfulness about values you've communicated to them prior as to how you want to live your life. I'll expand.

I told my parents in 2009 that I was no longer a Christian and I would no longer be attending church. After much crying, yelling and shouting, they told me they loved me and would accept my decision.

In 2013, @UbaSocrates tells them he's agnostic. They refused to accept his decision so he asked "why does eche get to skip church but I can't?"

Apparently this was news to them and I was summoned for family meeting.

At the family meeting

"Is it true that you no longer go to church"

Me: yes.

Parents: and now you have influenced your younger brother to do the same? Are you happy?

Me: Technically, I'm atheist he's agnostic so small hope still dey

I was amused at the whole charade because they acted like the conversation we had in 2009 never happened. They knew I had not been Christian for awhile but for my relatives sake, they wanted me to perform. You have to wage war continuously and shamelessly

Wage war continuously doesn't mean be aggressive every time. It requires wisdom, discernment and choosing your battles

Sometimes you have to play a long time before you can play yourself. At the visa interview at the US embassy in Lagos, I kept saying to myself

"if this people fuck up and approve this visa to Yankee issolova Jackie. Don't cry. Don't beg"

My parents tried to enroll me into Faith Academy. (Covenant University’s Primary school). I knew Oyedepo himself would personally see to it that I was broken.. So on the day of orientation interview, I came ready for war.

school Interviewers: Eche. What would you like to be?

Me:

As the first born, I’m glad my other siblings benefited off my rebellion. Now they roam the streets free to be who they want to be without worry. I observe how free my sister is today and I’m so proud of her because

Being rebellious became my default setting. I took the mindset into other facets of life. I'm pretty chill but I've had to embrace madness because Nigerian families/society will turn you into peak Leondardo Dicaprio with all the performances but no Oscar.

I've had 30+ women visiting lagos in December, tell me they can't leave the house because of curfew.

I understand that I have male privilege, but if you had broken your parents early in life where would they find the strength to say the word curfew?

In Lagos, I'll be getting ready to leave the house, I can see my mom, the look on her face, her spirit is bothered, she wants to say something, she wants to activate her default setting. But this is how I wage war continuously