Ok, I'm gonna trigger warn the hell out of this for CSA, abuse, etc. We need to have a talk about that article on that website by that gowl. Yes, I'm being vague. I'm not going to point people to it. if you know it, you know it.

I grew up in a physically, emotionally and sexually abusive household. And then get to go to escape to school in an emotionally and physically abusive school.

There was never a time I felt completely safe past 6 yo It wasn't until I was out of that house that I felt safe.

And in before someone says this is why I'm trans. I knew I was trans as early as I could imagine. The abuse happened in part because I was trans and because I have a shit ma who covered up for my sexual abuser.

Anyhow.

Being a trans kid and not having anywhere to go to figure that out, yeah, that fucks you up.

Add onto it constant abuse from peers, CSA from a male relative, abuse from parents and you know what?

I consider myself hella fucking lucky. Why?

Cause the SECOND I was out of that and could get into therapy I desperately knew I needed, I did. Like, my fuckage from all of that was inward self destruction mostly with a side of "Fuck you, I don't care, what you gonna do, kill me, please do and save me the bother."

But, I was also thankfully.... lucky enough I guess to realise all the shit I went through was fucked up and that I needed help and if I didn't get it, I would spiral.

So I got help. And after a LONG time things got better. I'm still not entirely unfucked up. I never will be.

I get freaked out easy. I have a hard time trusting people. If people break that trust they will never ever ever get it back. BUT, I'm not carrying around a way to remove myself the second the pain gets too bad anymore. I actually like myself a LOT more than I did at 19.

But. Again. Lucky. And then I see that girl who that gowl wrote about and I'm like. Shit, that could VERY easily have been me. If the abuse had been worse. If the help had been harder to find. If I was slightly less insightful. If the breeze blew the wrong way.

One of the thing abuse does to a lot of people is makes us pissed off and full of wanting to burn it all down. But. But. But. Here is the thing.

When it's cis folks who are abused, especially cis women, no matter how fucked they've been, there will be someone going "well, abuse"

Look, I've been around the feminist block for 30 years. Aileen Wuornos. We all had *that* complicated discussion, right? Valerie Solanas anyone? Yeah. Yeaaah.

So yeah, you have a trans kid who sounds like she's been through the fucking wringer and came through it a mess but, but, cis society doesn't allow us to be messes and when we are, no matter way, it's somehow our fucking fault.

And you have a worthless human who somehow, magically, got access to PULSE *somehow* who is using this *childs* fuckedupness to go "Look. See. Trans ppl do fucked up shit."

No dumbass. Hurt people hurt people.

Instead of having the conversation of How do you help someone who has been this damaged and how did they get that way and how did we drop in the ball in protecting this kid and what could we have done differently and how to we help now.

No. we're gonna have that convo. Ok. Lets

Trans women only. How clean to you keep your nose in order to stay out of trouble?

I dunno about you, but I'm in the My NCT is out of date level of lawlessness because the cops, the state, all of them scare the shit out of me and the idea of dealing with them sends me into panic.

Why? I come from a country that if you're a tw, regardless of genital config, you can be sentenced to boy jail which is essentially being sentenced to rape.

So yeah. I keep my nose clean because your society says if I don't I'll be harmed.

If we're going to talk about prisons (prison abolitionist here) and how to keep all inmates safe. Lets. Let's talk about how to keep people regardless of gender safe, as is the states fucking responsibility when those people are in their care.

And I'm sorry but, prison for an 18 year old kid who went through the wringer is not the solution to anything other than fucking them up even more.

I don't care if that kid is cis or trans. they're still children.

Like, I'm sorry, I know, this is bleeding heart me saying this, but you know who I learned this from?

The Catholic Church. (liberation theology high school teachers). So Mr. Right wing I'm so Catholic, save the babies till they're 18, then fuck 'em can go get in the sea.

Look. None of this justifies what the kid did or didn't do. It's fucked up and she obviously needs help. Like I did. Like the loads of kids who were abused in this country under the various systems we put in place to hurt people.

Few people like that are irredeemable. IMO, the only people who are are the people who violate the privacy of a kid to put her face on an article to make rightwing transphobic points and increase the steadily increasing transhostility in this country. That person can get fucked.

Because all that person has done is to further abuse and hurt that kid. Which is gross.

One more thing here. This is a hard read and there is no good in this at all.

The state failed this child. Her parents failed her. And all the people hopping on the hate bandwagon are furthering the abuse. Shame on all of them. https://amp.independent.ie/irish-news/teen-who-vows-to-kill-set-to-be-back-on-the-streets-within-weeks-38653835.html