What’s the first thing you’re gonna do after you’re vaccinated safely and effectively? Not the most important thing, or the most meaningful thing, or the most vital thing. The FIRST thing.

I am gonna get a frickin Big Mac meal and eat that sucker IN THE RESTAURANT.

Y’all I understand that the vaccine will take time to take effect in my body, I didn’t mean what are you going to do 10 seconds after you get the shot. That’s why I said safely and effectively.

Anyway if you enjoyed this bit of wish fulfillment fantasy, please donate to your local food bank and Black Lives Matter groups if you’re able. We’re not out of this yet. I love you all.

OK I am muting anyone who comes into this thread to splain vaccines to me, I really understand how they work, and I blocking anyone being shitty to other people just trying to have a moment of wishful happiness.

I am headed to bed and this thread is blowing up enough that I can’t respond to everyone, but I see you and I love you and I am sorry you’re hurting for so many things. For your hugs and your loved ones and your comforts, for your friends and your new nieces and your bars.

I don’t know when or how or if we’re going to get through the pandemic (and everything else we’re facing right now either) but I want you know that you’re loved, and that we’ll fight through all of it. And at the end, I’ll be there for a hug if you want one. Goodnight.

Another fun thing about having a popular tweet is the dudes (it’s almost always men) who make the same joke over and over. In this case it’s responding “roll down my sleeve.” Twitter is so weird.

I can’t possibly read the hundreds of responses to the original tweet that came in overnight. I want to hug all of you who need that.