1/
#HumanismAlways, Day 4
Patient
“Wait—let me take off my shoes and jacket before you weigh me.”
The nurse shrugged. But the thing is—I know my weight is up. And I don’t need nothing to make it worse. .
Me: “What is it? I can’t look.”
Her: “231.6 today.”
Shit.
#HumanismAlways, Day 4
Patient
“Wait—let me take off my shoes and jacket before you weigh me.”
The nurse shrugged. But the thing is—I know my weight is up. And I don’t need nothing to make it worse. .
Me: “What is it? I can’t look.”
Her: “231.6 today.”
Shit.
2/
Doctor
I’m exhausted. My inbox is exploding and I totally forgot curriculum night was last night.
Shit.
I clicked through the flow sheet.
Nurse: “What you groaning about?”
Me: “Life. And my pt you just checked in gained 8 lbs in 3 months.”
Nurse: “Weight is complicated.”
Doctor
I’m exhausted. My inbox is exploding and I totally forgot curriculum night was last night.
Shit.
I clicked through the flow sheet.
Nurse: “What you groaning about?”
Me: “Life. And my pt you just checked in gained 8 lbs in 3 months.”
Nurse: “Weight is complicated.”
3/
Patient
If it wasn’t for me needing my medicines? I wouldn’t never come up here. Some doctors treat you like it ain’t in you to be ever healthy.
Especially if you heavy.
It’s like they give up. You can tell. I wish there was a way to just get my prescriptions and leave.
Patient
If it wasn’t for me needing my medicines? I wouldn’t never come up here. Some doctors treat you like it ain’t in you to be ever healthy.
Especially if you heavy.
It’s like they give up. You can tell. I wish there was a way to just get my prescriptions and leave.
4/
Doctor
I really like Ms. James. But I just don’t get it. Why keep every appt and insist that you want to lose weight over & over again—but show up with fast food?
Then there’s the requests for diet pills. Which is senseless if you won’t change your diet.
But I do like her.
Doctor
I really like Ms. James. But I just don’t get it. Why keep every appt and insist that you want to lose weight over & over again—but show up with fast food?
Then there’s the requests for diet pills. Which is senseless if you won’t change your diet.
But I do like her.
5/
Patient
My doctor is a slim little thing. Narrow about the waist and hips with slender wrists. I find myself wondering if a person like that could ever be overweight.
My guess is no.
Them: “Hey Ms. James. It’s good to see you.”
Me: “It’s good to see you, too.”
Here we go.
Patient
My doctor is a slim little thing. Narrow about the waist and hips with slender wrists. I find myself wondering if a person like that could ever be overweight.
My guess is no.
Them: “Hey Ms. James. It’s good to see you.”
Me: “It’s good to see you, too.”
Here we go.
6/
Patient
Them: “So, Ms. James. How’ve things been?”
Let’s see. I could share that mama’s dementia is getting worse. And that she don’t know who I am anymore and that my siblings don’t help. Or that I’m worried ‘bout my grandbaby who 4 and don’t talk.
Them: “Ms. James?”
Patient
Them: “So, Ms. James. How’ve things been?”
Let’s see. I could share that mama’s dementia is getting worse. And that she don’t know who I am anymore and that my siblings don’t help. Or that I’m worried ‘bout my grandbaby who 4 and don’t talk.
Them: “Ms. James?”
7/
Doctor
She looks out of sorts today. Not her usual spirited self.
Me: “You okay?”
Her: “Me? Oh. Yes. Things are fine. I’m okay.”
*silence*
Me: “Ms. James your sugar was 281 in triage. And your blood pressure was up. Did you get to take your pills and insulin?”
Sigh.
Doctor
She looks out of sorts today. Not her usual spirited self.
Me: “You okay?”
Her: “Me? Oh. Yes. Things are fine. I’m okay.”
*silence*
Me: “Ms. James your sugar was 281 in triage. And your blood pressure was up. Did you get to take your pills and insulin?”
Sigh.
8/
Patient
1. I don’t take that water pill when I catch the bus.
2. I don’t take my insulin if I haven’t eaten.
3. They said come fasting.
4. I take the bus here.
Me: “Not all of them.”
Them: “I really need you to take all your meds before you come.”
I need a lot of stuff.
Patient
1. I don’t take that water pill when I catch the bus.
2. I don’t take my insulin if I haven’t eaten.
3. They said come fasting.
4. I take the bus here.
Me: “Not all of them.”
Them: “I really need you to take all your meds before you come.”
I need a lot of stuff.
9/
Doctor
Me: “I want to talk about your weight.”
She sighed.
Me: “We can’t ignore this. I was hoping some of the changes we made might’ve helped you lose instead.”
*silence*
Me: “Did you ever go see the dietitian I referred you to?”
Doctor
Me: “I want to talk about your weight.”
She sighed.
Me: “We can’t ignore this. I was hoping some of the changes we made might’ve helped you lose instead.”
*silence*
Me: “Did you ever go see the dietitian I referred you to?”
10/
Patient
Here we go.
Dietitian? You mean the one with the extra copay on a whole different day?
Me: “No. I didn’t make it.”
They clicked through screens. And that’s when I saw it. That tiny shift. Body language that moved from disappointed to me being a lost cause.
Yup.
Patient
Here we go.
Dietitian? You mean the one with the extra copay on a whole different day?
Me: “No. I didn’t make it.”
They clicked through screens. And that’s when I saw it. That tiny shift. Body language that moved from disappointed to me being a lost cause.
Yup.
11/
Doctor
The last few times I’ve seen Ms. James she’s gained more weight and had worse control of her medical issues. When I ask she seems blah. But she keeps her appts.
I don’t get it.
I care about her. And I want her to be well. So you know what? I tell her just that.
Doctor
The last few times I’ve seen Ms. James she’s gained more weight and had worse control of her medical issues. When I ask she seems blah. But she keeps her appts.
I don’t get it.
I care about her. And I want her to be well. So you know what? I tell her just that.
12/
Patient
It caught me off guard when my doctor stopped typing and stared straight in my face. Almost on the brink of tears.
Them: “Ms. James? I care about you so much. You’ve been seeing me since I was an intern.”
I was speechless.
Them: “What’s going on with you?”
Patient
It caught me off guard when my doctor stopped typing and stared straight in my face. Almost on the brink of tears.
Them: “Ms. James? I care about you so much. You’ve been seeing me since I was an intern.”
I was speechless.
Them: “What’s going on with you?”
13/
Doctor
I couldn’t believe my ears. Just one little question in this whole world of stress and pain was opened up to me. And all this time I never knew any of that.
Damn.
How was I supposed to know about her mama? Or her grandson?
The same way I found out today. By asking.
Doctor
I couldn’t believe my ears. Just one little question in this whole world of stress and pain was opened up to me. And all this time I never knew any of that.
Damn.
How was I supposed to know about her mama? Or her grandson?
The same way I found out today. By asking.
14/
Patient
I’m so glad it was some tissues in that room today! Nobody ever seem to ask how I felt about nothing. So once I got started telling my piece, those tears just started to flowing.
I talked about my mama.
And my grandson, too.
And how scared I am.
Patient
I’m so glad it was some tissues in that room today! Nobody ever seem to ask how I felt about nothing. So once I got started telling my piece, those tears just started to flowing.
I talked about my mama.
And my grandson, too.
And how scared I am.
15/
Doctor
She told me this had all been going on for a while. She even started crying which surprised me since she’s usually so stoic.
Then, something really strange happened. She asked about me.
Her: “What about you, doctor? You seem like you flying on one wing, too.”
Me?
Doctor
She told me this had all been going on for a while. She even started crying which surprised me since she’s usually so stoic.
Then, something really strange happened. She asked about me.
Her: “What about you, doctor? You seem like you flying on one wing, too.”
Me?
16/
Patient
One thing I do know about is loving on and raising up kids. I told my doctor that if you just love ‘em they’ll turn out just fine. Even if you missed the curriculum night.
Me: “Trust me on that.”
Like I said, I’m glad it was some tissues in there.
Patient
One thing I do know about is loving on and raising up kids. I told my doctor that if you just love ‘em they’ll turn out just fine. Even if you missed the curriculum night.
Me: “Trust me on that.”
Like I said, I’m glad it was some tissues in there.
17/
Doctor
I was embarrassed when Ms. James saw me cry. But right away she made me feel better.
Her: “We a crying mess, ain’t we?”
That made us both just laugh and laugh.
That day? We had our first real conversation about her health. And together, we came up with a plan.
Doctor
I was embarrassed when Ms. James saw me cry. But right away she made me feel better.
Her: “We a crying mess, ain’t we?”
That made us both just laugh and laugh.
That day? We had our first real conversation about her health. And together, we came up with a plan.
18/
Patient
This was the first time I left the doctors office and didn’t feel bad. Matter of fact, I felt good.
Happy even.
And I didn’t even know about all the stuff the social worker told me when she came in. To help with my mama AND my grand baby.
I might cry again.
Patient
This was the first time I left the doctors office and didn’t feel bad. Matter of fact, I felt good.
Happy even.
And I didn’t even know about all the stuff the social worker told me when she came in. To help with my mama AND my grand baby.
I might cry again.
19/
Doctor
Nurse Kay saw me in the hall and asked how it went.
Me: “Good. Really good.”
Nurse: “I’m so glad.”
Me: “You were right. Weight is complicated.”
People aren’t, though.
We all want feel seen. And make sure those we love are okay.
That’s all.
#7daysofHumanism
Doctor
Nurse Kay saw me in the hall and asked how it went.
Me: “Good. Really good.”
Nurse: “I’m so glad.”
Me: “You were right. Weight is complicated.”
People aren’t, though.
We all want feel seen. And make sure those we love are okay.
That’s all.
#7daysofHumanism