In light of some recent comments on my tweets I've seen the error of my ways and decided to write Exclusively Heterosexual Content please join me.

Once upon a time there was a guy named brokugou chadsuki. He was buff as hell and wore muscle shirts but not in a gay way +

His number one rival was miduderiya Dudeku. They'd been gravitating towards each other since kindergarten. Chadsuki slept with a photo of Dudeku on his pillow, but also not in a gay way. Just a rival way. Every night he would look deep into the eyes of his photo and swear

To get on top of him someday. Dudeku was weak and quirkless and belonged on the bottom.

But one day, Dudeku took his shirt off in the locker room and chadsuki noticed... Good god. A six pack. A beautifully sculpted and toned stomach, bulging biceps, and rippling pecs

Were hiding under dudeku's shirt.

Chadsuki was livid. when was dudeku get so strong? Did he start working out? Did it have anything to do with how tight his uniform pants had become around the ass? Was he seeing someone (for training)?

Chadsuki had to know. He had to

Get to the bottom of this. Ask dudeku some deep, penetrating questions. Really pump him for answers. Get him to hold nothing back, to spill his secrets all over katsuki right in front of everyone.

He grabbed dudeku by one rock hard bicep and demanded answers. "Dudeku, when did +

You get so fucking beefy?"

Dudeku blinked his clear emerald green eyes. "I've been hiding a deep, dark secret from you. I have a quirk, Kacchad."

Chadsuki trembled with the force of this new knowledge. His palms sparked. The smell was sweet, like doritoes and mountain dew

Because his palms produced flammable axe body spray that he lit with his vape. "Dudeku," he trembled, pecs heaving. "You can't keep secrets from me. You're mine. My rival and nobody else's, in a completely heterosexual way."

Dudeku's pink, plump lips pursed as he moaned

"I just can't keep secrets from you, Kacchad. We're so connected i feel like i need to give you every part of me, in a figurative sense because I'm not gay and we're just good, heterosexual friends."

Chadsuki slammed Dudeku against the locker room wall. "Dudeku," he growled

"I need you to come...to your senses. Reach deep inside yourself and pull out the truth. Strip yourself bare, but only metaphorically because we're straight."

Dudeku fluttered his eyelashes. "anything for you, kacchad," he sighed. "i wasn't supposed to share this with anyone...

... But it's okay if it's you."

Chadsuki roared with satisfaction as his curiosity came to a climax. "give it to me, dudeku. Deliver me the truth. You know i can take it."

"Yes, kacchad," dudeku parted his pretty, glossy lips. His eyes sucked chadsuki in, green like the grass

In a football stadium, the place where chadsuki was born. just like every other straight man, he was assembled with power tools under the starry sky that mirrored deku's freckles, because he was straight. Dudeku filled him wih such desire. The desire for meat. The desire to

Own a pickup truck. The desire to assemble ikea furniture without looking at the instructions because reading was for girls, and gays.

He leaned so close they almost touched. Almost, but not actually, because they were both guys.

"I'm ready for you, dudeku," he murmured.

"Kacchad, I'm afraid."

"Don't be. Eyes on me. Just think about me. Think about me long and hard."

Dudeku nodded. "Only for you, kacchad."

And then they boned.

But it's okay. they said no homo afterwards so it wasn't gay.

And in the end, that's what makes a vas deferens.

I'm tying to get a swimming pool and fill it with mountain dew. Every little helps https://ko-fi.com/E1E2OGQQ