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As promised, here we go with a thread about OCD & the f2f teaching that so many universities including my own are trying to make us do
Cc @MadCovid #MadCovidChat
1/ https://twitter.com/EHopeDoherty/status/1309261484543877122">https://twitter.com/EHopeDohe...
Cc @MadCovid #MadCovidChat
1/ https://twitter.com/EHopeDoherty/status/1309261484543877122">https://twitter.com/EHopeDohe...
Firstly I will say I used to have germ-related OCD (in 2016 & 2017). As @hagenilda has pointed out before, not all OCD is germ-related (remember all those fucking awful articles going around back in March/April about OCD being "helpful"?)
This is not about that. 2/
This is not about that. 2/
Germ-related OCD is involved, but I& #39;m seeking to make a wider point that the elevated responsibility required for TAs/teaching staff to keep students ~as safe as possible~ (in this context what does that even mean) has potential to create & reinforce thought patterns of OCD 3/
By which I mean obsessive anxiety, spiralling worry that allows room for no other thoughts, & possibly also behaviours that promise to ease these points of worry but which never do & instead become repetitive, compulsive & ultimately debilitating. 4/
So as someone who is relatively & #39;recovered& #39; (I don& #39;t know how I feel abt this word but here is not the place for that rumination) from OCD, I can predict how this is going to go for me. We were told yesterday TAs are responsible for cleaning rooms before & after teaching. 5/
Not that I& #39;d want anyone else to have to do this job either! But this job is going to be difficult for TAs bc we will clean the room, then sit/stand for an hour watching the students touch and use the surfaces, especially desks, that we have just cleaned. 6/
So the worst thing for me is going to be watching the students & thinking, & #39;oh shit oh fuck they just touched that piece of desk, did I clean that bit of desk adequately? What if I didn& #39;t, just by my own carelessness, & I& #39;ve now at worst endangered their life?& #39; 7/
Then there& #39;s & #39;That student just touched the desk, and then they rubbed their eye after. What if there& #39;s harmful chemicals in the cleaning equipment I used & what if it was still wet & they& #39;re now going to have a poorly eye?& #39; 8/
Another possibility: & #39;So the cleaning equipment has been handled by other people. What if I accidentally brushed my clothes against one of the containers (eg a bottle of spray) and then this contaminated spot on my clothes fell against one of the desks, maybe on the underside 9/
where I didn& #39;t notice? And what if I didn& #39;t clean that part of the desk well enough, & now there& #39;s a dangerous area on the desk for the student to unknowingly touch? Esp bc the cleaning equipment will surely be hotspots of virus bc they& #39;re used to clean communal surfaces?& #39; 10/
And on and on it goes. I can think of more examples (haha of course I can) but hopefully you can see how OCD thought patterns can so easily become attached to this one responsibility among many. 11/
My germ related OCD was/is quite specific so I don& #39;t tend to worry about covid for myself (thankfully) but it& #39;s easy to imagine how this thought process might go with - rationally & understandably - worrying about catching covid oneself as well. 12/
And then multiply all these possibilities for the students. A student might come into the room & concentrate the whole time on not touching the desk, bc they don& #39;t know how trustworthy the cleaning technique of the TA has been. They might get pins&needles/cramp as a result 13/
(This happened to me a lot when I was ill with OCD as an undergrad; often I& #39;d get muscle tension headaches from angling my head to avoid touching it on the backrest of a chair and so on) 14/
I won& #39;t bother illustrating all the possible scenarios for students bc I& #39;m sure you get the idea by now! My point is that f2f teaching in this current situation (esp in Durham where we are currently in a local lockdown, which management seem to have forgotten) is going to 15/
cause so many difficulties from a mental health perspective on top of everything else. We already know that mental illness in student populations is frequent. My point here is that, even for those without pre-existing mental illness, 16/
the stress involved in leading/attending f2f teaching sessions during an escalating pandemic has the alarming potential to foster OCD-type thought patterns, even for those who have not experienced them before. Not to mention the real potential for causing a relapse 17/
(sorry & #39;relapse& #39; this is another term I don& #39;t like but) for those who are recovering from OCD, & for making things unbearable for those who are currently suffering with OCD. How any learning and & #39;pedagogical value& #39; can take place under this circumstances seems unfathomable 18/
So far I& #39;ve focused on cleaning procedures & associated worries bc those are the things I most strongly identify with OCD bc of my particular experience. But there& #39;s more. The university management (mine & others) are saying they& #39;ve made teaching rooms & #39;covid-safe& #39; 19/
For example, we& #39;ve been told there are perspex screens behind which TAs can teach without a mask. This flies in the face of new studies that stress the significance of aerosol transmission. A screen does not help that, ventilation & mask-wearing does. If this is 20/
the sort of thing that management means by & #39;covid-safe& #39; then they have proved their assessment of risk & safety to be untrustworthy, as was also brought up & helpfully explained in the @ucuatdurham meeting yesterday. 21/
OCD feeds on risk. No one - certainly not the employer - should ever get to decide what poses an acceptable level of risk for another person. Nobody. There is a significant risk to ~everyone~ in f2f teaching, & some people will be more medically vulnerable. Some will also be 22/
vulnerable to developing or worsening OCD (these groups of people I refer to here may also overlap!)
And no one should get to determine this risk for someone else, especially when university management are manipulating the category of & #39;covid-safe& #39; for their own convenience 23/
And no one should get to determine this risk for someone else, especially when university management are manipulating the category of & #39;covid-safe& #39; for their own convenience 23/
It is disappointing to see this happen when universities in general & @durham_uni in particular were exemplifying caution & awareness back in March independent of government delay & incompetence. This is certainly not the case any longer. This has all been avoidable. 24/
We& #39;re told the SU has campaigned for f2f all summer. But where was the room for teaching staff to enter the discussion? Were the most vulnerable and/or disadvantaged students (eg those doing key work/caring for family) able to join this campaign & make their voices heard? 25/
It is, quite literally, maddening to see f2f teaching being mandated in so many universities & individual depts when there are so many problems.
I wrote this a while ago about OCD - it makes life unbearable. I don& #39;t want to go there again. 26/ https://madcovid.wordpress.com/2020/05/11/my-ocd-seeing-red/">https://madcovid.wordpress.com/2020/05/1...
I wrote this a while ago about OCD - it makes life unbearable. I don& #39;t want to go there again. 26/ https://madcovid.wordpress.com/2020/05/11/my-ocd-seeing-red/">https://madcovid.wordpress.com/2020/05/1...
Anyway I& #39;ll stop now, I hope this thread is helpful in some way. Thank you @ucuatdurham for passing the motion yesterday for opt-out system for f2f teaching, thank you @matilda_jt for encouraging me to write to DUCU about this, & to everyone fighting against this situation FIN/
Oh and btw some of us at Durham only just found out we& #39;re being asked to do this YESTERDAY. I& #39;ve seen other people saying they still haven& #39;t been told whether they& #39;re expected to teach f2f. Our term starts in just over a week. https://twitter.com/EHopeDoherty/status/1309097944075980803">https://twitter.com/EHopeDohe...
