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"Sexual fluidity" and "queer" are terms that specifically mess w/lesbians' ability to recognize themselves & form community but they aren't accurate or safe terms for the majority of bisexual women, either...
There are distinct experiences that bi women have in sexual & romantic relationships w/men & women. Specifically, bi women are at increased risk of abuse from men due to homophobia & male entitlement to women's sexuality. Queer terminology refuses to recognize this...
Bi women don't usually experience relationships w/trans ppl to be identical to those with "cis" members of the same gender. A moral burden is placed on bi women to be accepting no matter what. Queer language distorts their ability to name the reality of having a trans partner...
Self-actualized bi women w/ a stable sexual identity often don't appreciate terms like "sexual fluidity", since they are always bisexual no matter the relationship (a cornerstone of bisexual activism) & their orientation isn't inherently "fluid" or mutable...
"Sexual fluidity" isn't an accurate term for the shifts in sexual expression some bisexual women experience when dating partners of various sexes, sexual orientations, or gender identities. It makes personal patterns- whether healthy or unhealthy- out to be unpredictable mush...
Words like "sexual fluidity" & "queer" make it more difficult for bi women to set boundaries in ways that overlap w/lesbians. It moralizes boundary setting, makes lack of sexual boundaries proof of personal sexual identity, & disallows making boundaries by sex or trans status...
Bi women also face a unique pressure towards polyamory in a number of queer-heavy scenes, as well as in general relationships w/men. If you are "up for anything" by definition, why "exclude" additional people from your intimate life unless, unless...
I think you don't hear a lot of bi women talking about this b/c many bi women have implicitly believed misogynistic things about their sexualities, or feel like no one would back them b/c unfortunately one of the only respites from queer nonsense is the hetero world...
I hope more bi women can be emboldened to discuss how this affects them personally, as bi women. This TED talk by Shannon Thrace, ex-wife of a transwoman who transitioned during the relationship, is one of the few I know that mentions it:
