Hello, I'm bisexual!

Though I think a lot of people sort of... assumed that about me (was it the times when I gushed over Gillian Anderson? My love of women in capes?) I think it's time I actually say it out loud. Mostly for myself.

So, hi! Hello.

#BiVisibilityDay

I just wanted to say a couple of things that I wish someone had told me, because I've been wrestling with this since I was... sixteen or so. Denying a part of you that is important leads to pain, so this is me, your big sibling, giving you some Big Truths because I love you, ok?

1. The main reason it took me so long to acknowledge that part of me was gatekeeping - other bi people telling me I couldn't be bi because I didn't do things the way they did. I internalised that for years.

Cut that shit out. No one owns bisexuality.

2. Bisexuality is a spectrum, and includes all genders by default. Wherever you are on that spectrum does not invalidate your bisexuality, and what's more, it can change. Don't beat yourself up for not being right in the middle.

3. Bisexuality doesn't look like one thing. It doesn't have to be cuffed jeans and Carly Rae Jepsen. It's cool if it is, but allowing more expressions of bisexuality eliminates gatekeeping. Don't worry that you don't fit if you don't match, ok?

4. Come out when you want to. Come out IF you want to. It doesn't invalidate you, your sexuality, or anything. If you are bisexual, you just ARE. You don't need validation, you don't need a badge or a certificate. It's just a fact about you already.

5. You can be on the bi spectrum AND the asexual spectrum. Your bisexuality might look and feel different. THAT DOES NOT INVALIDATE YOU. You might just have to do research on two things now. Sorry about that.

It will help you figure yourself out, though!

6. Love hard, and live your best life. You got this. Bisexual frog loves you.