The description of this man already I— he sounds DIS COS TAN. He’s grown and can’t tie his own shoes 




No wonder he doesn’t wash properly this guy lives on a house made of Lego. He probably doesn’t even have running water ew lmaoo
So far it’s not as “what the fuck am I reading?” But i know I’ll be in that state of mind soon
Now they’re fighting people in a bar what is going on
This reminds of those men that buy those £3000 sex dolls that look realistic. I think Louis Theroux did a documentary on it and it was...interesting ting
He’s dancing with his lil Lego girlfriend and is crying because she’s sad 




So the virgin isn’t a virgin he has sex with a sucubus and agreed to raise a baby with her if she got pregnant and she wiped his memory of this and he doesn’t remember anything? Hahaha WHATT
Why would ur first thought of someone being in ur bed be the neighbourhood dog I’m SCEMANIF
This is the flashback to how he got her pregnant and why his pp is black
This is the flashback to how he got her pregnant and why his pp is black
Jonothans different because he doesn’t want sex. He wants LoVe
This demon girl is 38 in human years but in demon years she’s 19...this reminds me of the math they use for dogs ages I’m so confused
Idk what is going on rn
Well I need to go back to work I guess I’ll go back to it later

So ur telling me Satan approved of his daughter marrying a mortal who lives in house built from fuckin Lego idk seems abit sus to me
Me reading this:
A demon just killed a bar full of people I’m so confused
Where is the romance? Where is the comedy???
“Can we change your name? I don’t want to call you jonothan it’s too gross.”
“Why is it gross?”
“In Hell it’s another name for penis”
“Why is it gross?”
“In Hell it’s another name for penis”
She asked to change his name and he suggested caspian, Greg etc and this fucking demon chose Froggy for him because she loves “froggies”
What the FUCK is going on
What the FUCK is going on
Nah I’m not even halfway through it fuck off im going sleep
This character and author is giving me major Comic Book Guy vibes from The Simpsons I cba
Hes gonna make her use her Demon powers to bring his Lego girlfriend alive I can sense it
Even though he didn’t want to marry her or have this demon spawn jonothan now wants to marry the demon girl because...because she said they can have a Lego wedding IM SCRAMINF HELP
“She wears her usual slobby pregnant clothes.”
Excuse me what
Excuse me what
Jonothan and his demo baby mum are now in hell and so am i as I continue to read this book :)xx
She killed jonothan and brought him back to life this is obvs gonna cause issues
Gemma Collins is me reading this book having no idea what’s going on and the rest of the house mates are the book.