Here's the thing with being nonverbal:

IT'S A STRESS RESPONSE!

When we feel we can't get our message out, we stop talking. So, if a parent is committed to misunderstanding their autistic child, they will appear "severe." 1/

A lot of people think that means we're calling them bad parents. No. It is possible that parent and child just aren't a good fit and don't understand each other well.

No one is calling anyone a bad parent until there is a refusal to understand us. 2/

"But you're high-functioning! You don't understand my kid!"

You honestly don't know my functioning level because you're not a doctor and, also, I'm no longer a child.

No one goes up to NT adults and says, "You don't understand my kid." 3/

For some reason, NTs realize they were kids once and can deduce the needs of NT kids. So, why do NTs think we can't possibly understand younger versions of ourselves?

Because we grew up and learned to talk? Seriously? People grow up and learn new things. 4/

As for this bs article that autistics think all autistics should be able to grow up and get a job:

No. We don't think we can all work or hold jobs. Many of us have had to get around that. What we're telling you is that we HAVE to get jobs because there are no 5/

reasonable accommodations for us on that front. So, you either need to start believing in your kid and help them do something, anything, to get some kind of income or they're gonna be screwed.

In case you haven't realized, WE DON'T LIKE THIS EITHER. 6/

The government in all countries is seriously messed up and doesn't understand autism. It's not cool that we don't qualify for assistance.

Our parents are generally the only assistance we have and they can't live forever. So, no matter how unfair it is, 7/

I had to spend my whole life finding ways to be just NT enough to function and make a living. My mom *had* to believe in me whether she thought I could do it or not because she knows she can't live forever and the world isn't going to suddenly accommodate me overnight. 8/

Now, we know many autistic adults won't be able to do that at all. We're not asshats who speak FOR anyone. We speak for ourselves and the group the best we can. 9/

So, believe me when I say there are a lot of us trying to start programs and assistance for our fellow autistics who may not be as able to overcome their lifelong trauma. 10/

Alienating yourself from #actuallyautistic people by twisting our words, interfering with our missions, and shouting over us will make it harder for your child to find our services when they no longer have you. You're denying them a voice and a community. 11/

I dare say that going so far as antagonizing and willfully misinterpreting adult autistics who are trying to help is abusive to your autistic child. 12/

And, let me just tell you, when I was in my most abusive relationship, my autism therapist truly had me written down as "level 3." If you don't know, that's the modern way of saying "severe."

Abuse plays a huge role in how our autism presents. 13/

Don't misunderstand me. I'm not saying all autistics who appear severe are being abused. Again, sometimes it's just a bad fit or a bad environment.

But, if this is the case, that's more reason to LISTEN instead of shutting us out. 14/

So, be mindful. Autistics are the only experts on autism. If we say something that doesn't sound right to you, ask for more info. It's more likely your misinterpreting what we're saying and you'd learn a lot to untangle those misunderstandings. 15/

Heck, if you stop arguing with adult autistics and listen, you may just find that you understand your nonverbal child a little better.

Just because we can form sentences, doesn't mean we're good at it.

Autism effects communication for ALL of us. 16/

In fact, some autistics become hypervebal as adults to compensate for being nonverbal as children.

Trust me when I say it's still just as frustrating as being nonverbal, if not more. Because, in that case, we say things, but none of it comes out right. 17/

And then we get to read articles about how we don't get what its like to be nonverbal because we said something that wasn't even what we meant. 18/

In other words, we learn to talk to make NTs happy only to be invalidated by those same NTs for talking at all.

Sounds like a good reason to stop talking completely, doesn't it? 19/