We talk a lot about how toxic theology harms queer folx—how false teaching about God creates shame, depression, can even lead to suicide.

But people like myself don't talk enough about how growing up in an affirming faith community helped us—so I want to share some of my story.

It's an incredible privilege for which I am overwhelmingly grateful. And it wasn't something I chose—any more than I chose to be bisexual.

But @BedfordChurch made me proud of who God created me to be. And it built the bedrock of faith that still sustains me.

I was taught that God loved me completely. I was taught that I was fearfully and wonderfully made, that who I was attracted to or fell in love with had no bearing on God's delight in my joy.

I watched my church fight the PC(USA) to ordain gay elders before it was "legal." And, when the PC(USA) took too long to follow God's call, I watched my minister do what was right and ordain a gay elder anyways—even though it put his own ordination in jeopardy.

More than any words preached from the pulpit, it was watching my church fight beside queer people that assured me my sexuality was every bit as sacred and holy as my heterosexual neighbors'.

Don't get me wrong: I still felt shame for many years about my bisexuality. But that was a product of the homophobia I experienced in the broader world—it was never taught to me in Church. To the contrary, my minister preached that hatred was the actual sin.

As a result, I always knew that my church was a place that I could turn to and feel safe. I knew that I was loved.

I have no doubt that it's a huge part of why I felt called to ministry—and why I'm so passionate about creating community for LGBTQIA+ people of faith.

And it's why I'm so grateful to work @middlechurch. When I see kids growing up in our pews, I know that some of them are hearing a message that could save them in the same way that it saved me.

Every time I see our queer Black men's choir sing, I weep because I know part of what it must feel like for a queer Black boy to see himself celebrated.

When I preach for Pride, I know that some child in the congregation will feel proud and beautiful.

This is how every child should feel in church—regardless of gender identity or sexual orientation! What a gift we have to offer!

Toxic theology's tragedy isn't just the damage it does to queer people—it's also the missed chance to hold folks in beautiful, life-affirming love.