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I feel like I am going to vomit 
https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🙂" title="Leicht lächelndes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Leicht lächelndes Gesicht">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🙂" title="Leicht lächelndes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Leicht lächelndes Gesicht">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🙂" title="Leicht lächelndes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Leicht lächelndes Gesicht">
Its the way that things would& #39;ve probably gone so much smoother if he hadn& #39;t threatened to sue me for "emotional distress" way back when.
Like I get it. They were your friends, too. But I wasn& #39;t the one who started running my mouth. I wasn& #39;t the one who wanted a poly relationship with two of our friends. And I certainly never asked you to ask our friends how they felt about me.
Also, "Lets keep this between us, okay?" As if I know you& #39;re not going back to ur siblings and telling them things that I& #39;ve said and about arguments we& #39;ve had. I needed someone to lean on too and it just happened to be one of our moots.
Mind you: This is also my best fucking friend from high school. Someone I& #39;ve been close to for nearly ten years at this point. Who& #39;s always had my fucking back. And ur gonna get upset because I went and told them how you made me feel? What you said to me?
Fuck you
There& #39;s so much anger thats still just built up and its just been static for a year now. You chose to leave me. You looked me in the eye when you left and told me you didn& #39;t love me anymore. No matter how hard I fucking cried. Stoic. Cold. Uncaring.
And then the fucking run around you put me through. "I still love you and I wanna fight for you." "I think we& #39;re better off as friends." "Okay, nevermind. Just get the divorce papers signed and send them to me and we can go our separate ways."
I never knew what to expect minute to minute. AND THEN YOU HAVE THE AUDACITY TO ASK ME IF I& #39;LL ASK OUR MUTUALS IF THEY WOULD EVER DATE YOU???
My head is spinning. I really think I& #39;m gonna get sick and I don& #39;t know what to do. It the fact that I& #39;d rather be ten feet underground than ever even have to look at you again. I hate myself.
Pro-tip for anyone who may not understand relationships completely: you don& #39;t ask your ex-partner to set you up with their fucking friends. If you learn anything from this useless thread, DON& #39;T do that.
I can& #39;t focus on anything that would make me feel better and I& #39;m having whole body shivers. I can& #39;t even go to sleep because my mind is just fucking racing with everything thats happened within the last year.
I& #39;m not mad at my friends. I could never. They& #39;ve stayed by my side and comforted me through all of this, and they never would& #39;ve known what He said without me mentioning it to earlier Moot.
Im more upset that I married someone like that. I& #39;m still working through the whole, "Dont regret those years" thing but its so fucking hard.
I wasted that time of my life. I left the school I worked so fucking hard to get into for a man who manipulated me and left when things got rough. I& #39;m angry that I put myself in this situation.
Im angry that I put my friends in such an uncomfortable situation, and now one of my moots has to fucking baby me everytime the panic attacks get to be just a little too much. I& #39;m so fucking over it.
