GOOD MORNING FUCKERS!!!!!! i’m still deeply sad because i’ll never be as good a writer as miss miller and now it’s time to make myself even sadder

it’s a The Magicians day! yeay

oH he has an emo haircut is he the sad gay one

they said narnia but!!!!!! with a clock

love how this whole thing so far is just [ominous music starts playing]

don’t listen to her real life is a scam

HOGWARTS?

OH THIS IS THE DRAMATIC GAY ONE

i peep a marvelous hEiGht DiFfEreNce

eliot is my son and that’s final

the dean really said if that’s your vibe go take over the world

i too would like to be taken away from my boring routine to a magical school and told that the only reason i’m depressed is because i’m too magical for a normal life

hold on what the fuck was that

eliot you are so fucking dramatic for no reason and that is so valid

everything is already so corny i LOVE it

HE WEARS V E S T S!!!!!!!!!!!

hahaha being unable to deal with the possibility of failure! i do that

oh so we’re getting friends turned rivals uh

the sheer serotonin pumping through my veins from the corniness of it all

quentin is such a cinnamon roll i wanna protecc

oooooouuuuuuh magic mirror

all i have to say is EW

OK MOTH MAN

i’m SO into it omg might just watch the whole thing straight yaknow

wow who could’ve guessed he would lock them in

rip to julia but i would simply never go into a cold room with someone behind me

MY SONS

rIngS

are we getting lesbians ? please tell me we’re getting lesbians

girlies i’m not saying your conversation isn’t interesting but there are more pressing matters don’t ya think

ELIOT YOU SMOOTH MOTHERFUCKER

plot twist the weird bitch is a weird bitch and the crazy people who hang out in an abandoned factory are actually crazy who’d have thought

PHOSPHOROMANCY BITCHES!!!!!!!

gay best friends!!!!!!!!

i am not singing taylor swift in my head jdidhdkdjsk

i feel a lot better now that i’ve joined a cult sure sis whatever works for you

oh she gay GAY

will i ever get over the fact that eliot dresses like he’s trying to be the new oscar wilde? probably not

less talking no touching is now my new motto

what if we went on an adventure to find a lost book and we were both gay

you’ve been a thing layer of insouciance over an open pit of self pity your entire life WELL DAMN

this is the point where i look at you like you’re nuts i love this little fucker with my whole heart

you’re always a raging dick sir that’s my sarcastic emotional support son

breaking a spell by singing obnoxious taylor swift songs yes we love to see it

if anyone hurts my baby i will fight

can eliot save him? can eliot please save him

just casually murdering latin ok cool

is no one going to ask questions about how it’s just a tad weird that the Chosen One is under a spell that conveniently can only be broken by removing all barriers around the magic school ?

julia dear maybe you should reconsider your life decisions

this is so dumb it’s fantastic

i mean they found an intruder who was supposed to have no memory of magic whatsoever and who cast a highly dangerous spell and they were like hm yeah that’s not nice but let’s all act like there’s nothing more to it

plus now that i think about it penny just waltzed into his brain and was like dude i know you’re in a weird vaguely threatening hospital right now but please stop singing like that’s a normal thing

THEY’RE HOLDING HANDS!!!!!!!!!!

is penny just too good looking to have a good time ? is this it ?

fuck dads!!! dads are terrible!!!!!

the metaphors are sO on the nose it’s bloody hilarious

julia baby please seek help

love or cocaïne tomato tomahto

moth man is back yeay

alice really said listen to my nerd friend i love it here

MY DRAMATIC ASS SON

lesson of the day : be a cunning motherfucker

you’re telling me margo is not a lesbian? yeah sure

uGH hets

quentin and alice are so sweet i’m Tenderised

acknowledge the romantic subtext? no i don’t think i will

alice honey unleash your fucking power i wanna see you conquer the world

ok what the fuck

magical,,,,,, ducks ?

i’m fucking cackling what the fuck mister russian man

GOD NO