Thread/TRIGGER warning mental illness: Since we are talking #OCD, let me illustrate what #postpartumOCD can look like: unwanted, intrusive, upsetting thoughts and/or graphic images re:
- sexually assaulting your baby or child
- killing your child, purposely or unintentionally (1/

- losing control, killing yourself, abandoning your family
- having a terminal illness that will be diagnosed too late, leaving your child(ren) alone
- leaving your child in a hot car
- others that stand in direct opposition to what you hold true for yourself (“ego-dystonic”)(2/

I’ve had OCD all my life & few external compulsions: most of mine are ritualistic thoughts to neutralize the obsessions. Here’s what compulsions can look like postpartum:
- repeatedly asking others for reassurance
- exposing self to graphic images to “prove” they horrify you (3/

- checking for tumors; repeated doctor appointments
- singing songs, praying, counting because they feel “safe”/protective
- compulsive cleaning to keep environment safe (esp. during #COVID19) (4/)

The compulsive thoughts and actions are meant to ease the anxiety of the intrusive thoughts and images but they become merciless taskmasters you MUST adhere to, otherwise the worst can happen. So they don’t ease the anxiety at all. (5/

I’ve had #OCD since I was 7 but was officially diagnosed in my 20s. Everyone has some level of intrusive thoughts but they can push them away or discount them as bizarre or silly. With OCD, the thoughts chase you. Like a living nightmare. (6/

I was off meds during my first two pregnancies but became so tortured that during my subsequent ones I went back on. This was scary because meds fueled the idea that I could harm my unborn child, especially after losing my first to a #birthdefect (7/

But the torture and lack of enjoying life at all meant I needed to also prioritize my #mentalhealth. And I am an academic and a therapist so I needed to take care of myself first. Without #selfcare I couldn’t take care of my family. (8/

There are lots of options for meds, all with side effects, so this needs to be done carefully. And good evidence-based treatments too. I live with OCD every day but it usually doesn’t control my life, even now, 2 months postpartum. (9/

OCD affects 3% of the population but likely more who are terrified to come forward and seek treatment, share the horrible thoughts, and be told they are sick and twisted. But the exact opposite will happen with a good, trained therapist. (10/

These examples are just a handful of what OCD CAN look like postpartum, but experiences vary and these examples can also apply to people who haven’t just given birth. OCD thoughts and compulsions can be as unique as the people who have them. (11/

And people with OCD are highly intelligent, loving, moral, good people. This is why the thoughts are so upsetting for us. We recognize how twisted they are. We are not the same as those diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder ( #OCPD) (12/

Those with OCPD are more perfectionistic, rigorously orderly, impose these needs on others and tend to not have the self awareness that this might be a problem. Can you see the difference? (13/

I hope this helps you understand better, thanks for coming to my #TedTalk. As a reward, here is adorable Nell. (14/14)

(THANK YOU @shiraisinspired for starting important conversations)