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randomly deciding to watch the dirty dozen, an'... I notice there's one black guy. Of course his sentence is hanging. I wonder if he'll be the first to die.
It sounds like they decided to dub in the guards randomly yelling at the prisoners... so weirdly energetic and out of place, hnngh
"You were a big man with the syndicate back in Chicago?"
"... You've seen my record!?"
DUDE, HE'S READING IT RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU. YES.
"... You've seen my record!?"
DUDE, HE'S READING IT RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU. YES.
oh hey, racism joke. Immediately followed by a rapist. Wonderful. I mean, these guys are made out to be horrible prisoners. But hnngh.
Oh looooveeellly. And they say the n-word. Here's to hoping the rapist pig dies first.
Oh looooveeellly. And they say the n-word. Here's to hoping the rapist pig dies first.
I feel like this would have led to Looney Tunes shenanigans if they filmed for much longer.
... so this film is supposed to be a comedy, I assume? Weird, I thought it'd be more... drama-ish. Hm. Does have some silly moments.
No, no... definitely a comedy. Dafuq is this movie. "Pretend to be a general", hnngh. Maybe the army was different then, I 'unno. "I thought maybe the general would have wanted to inspect our finest platoon!" bish plz. No general cares enough for that.
oofh.
Just...
Oofh.
Just...
Oofh.
Things got right creepy right quick
I love how during the "wargames" portion, they pretend to have a strategy by deciding to drop while the mortars are raining down, but run while the soldiers are reloading, like... the mortars aren't gonna simply avoid ya if you hit the deck, fuggin' move xD
Alternatively, they could've waited for the literal two minutes that drill took. I'm sure it wouldn't have killed *that* much time to do it after the drill. Sure was the probability of alternatives while the drill was in progress, though...
"Posey, remember, you're hurt."
"Oh, ahm dah-in :>"
Of course I think the buff guy's cute. I mean, Jefferson's ace, but yeh.
"Oh, ahm dah-in :>"
Of course I think the buff guy's cute. I mean, Jefferson's ace, but yeh.
Oh hey, Jefferson didn't die first.
The Spanish-speaking guy did. Great.
Out of all 12 of the guys there, 10 were white, yet's it's one of the two minorities who get killed.
Great.
The Spanish-speaking guy did. Great.
Out of all 12 of the guys there, 10 were white, yet's it's one of the two minorities who get killed.
Great.
I thought about this at the start of the film, but it just dawned on me again - these guys are doing something almost completely pointless. Which is cool, I guess - gets their freedom, those who survive. But it's like... they're blowing up 1 building immediately before D-Day.
oh, lol, that's why Posey looks so familiar... played by Clint Walker, hnngh.
Thought I recognized that chest somewhere.
Fugger looks hawt in a beard, an' I don't usually like beards, hm.
Thought I recognized that chest somewhere.
Fugger looks hawt in a beard, an' I don't usually like beards, hm.
Jim Brown was pretty swanky, too. Damn.
Oh of course, the creeper picks a room where a lady tries to enter. Of course. Not to mention the racist prick got teamed up with the only Black guy in the movie. ugh.
AND HE BRINGS HER OUT TO THE MAIN HALL WTF
I hate this guy so much, hnngh
Demands for her to scream at knife-point, hnngh
I hate this guy so much, hnngh
Demands for her to scream at knife-point, hnngh
lol, Franko throws two grenades and there's leik 5 explosions and sparklers, dafuq
oh no General Pinkley
good, glad it was Jefferson who shot the creeper. Telly did a damn good job with that character - very disgusting.
(Nazis get spooked, hole up in the bunker, locking the door behind them and preventing the protagonists from entering)
"You didn't think about that, did ya?"
"They gotta breathe, don't they?"
I dunno man. Being monsters, there's no way to know for sure what they do to stay alive.
"You didn't think about that, did ya?"
"They gotta breathe, don't they?"
I dunno man. Being monsters, there's no way to know for sure what they do to stay alive.
"What do we do about them?" (motions to the captive staff of the building)
"We'll... feed the French and kill the Germans"
hnnngh
If they were forced to work there, there's probably no guilty staff, otherwise they're both villains, n' I dunno. Just feels weird, man.
"We'll... feed the French and kill the Germans"
hnnngh
If they were forced to work there, there's probably no guilty staff, otherwise they're both villains, n' I dunno. Just feels weird, man.
Okay, okay, wtf.
I love Pinkley, he was good. But he got a slow-motion death sequence, and afterwards we cut to his corpse every time someone passes him by.
Meanwhile Jiminez broke his neck while parachuting - which only happened off screen - an' he's never spoken of again.
Wtf.
I love Pinkley, he was good. But he got a slow-motion death sequence, and afterwards we cut to his corpse every time someone passes him by.
Meanwhile Jiminez broke his neck while parachuting - which only happened off screen - an' he's never spoken of again.
Wtf.
Wait, Franko didn't throw the two overcompensating grenades. Also I guess the guy who did is dead now, 'cause after he got his foot caught in the roof and threw the 'nades, we also never see him again.
Unless if Franko managed to skidoodle his butt on down the building off screen
Unless if Franko managed to skidoodle his butt on down the building off screen
(prepares to dismiss the captive French staff before murdering the Germans)
in English: "Alright you Frenchies, beat it!"
That's... that's not how this works man, no.
in English: "Alright you Frenchies, beat it!"
That's... that's not how this works man, no.
I love how the vents to the vault are a straight shot - no curves, bends... just some cheap covers you can bash off with a rock or accidentally run over, hnngh.
I mean, I know the nazis were friggin' idiots, buh heeh.
I mean, I know the nazis were friggin' idiots, buh heeh.
I'm just saying, they're hiding in a bunker, but they just half-assed the vents, apparently expecting anyone assaulting the building to just sit there an' give up when it comes to the obvious vents.
Also they apparently designed the bunker to be locked from the outside.
Nice.
Also they apparently designed the bunker to be locked from the outside.
Nice.
Gotta get that one last "I'mma mourn Gen'ral Pinkley" shot in before they hit the road, I see.
Love how every time they shoot somebody in the window, you can't just have someone stop shooting, you gotta have 'em fly out the window as though they had to run through the glass panes like a stuntman.
'cause that's kinda what had to happen for the effect, you see.
That's a joke
'cause that's kinda what had to happen for the effect, you see.
That's a joke
Damn, they got Jefferson.
OH SHIT. He gets dramatic reaction shots from the survivors, AND dramatic music :O
I mean he totally deserved it, but hot DAMN.
These people REALLY didn't like the Jiminez character, fuck.
OH SHIT. He gets dramatic reaction shots from the survivors, AND dramatic music :O
I mean he totally deserved it, but hot DAMN.
These people REALLY didn't like the Jiminez character, fuck.
Jefferson deserved the attention, I mean, not the death. He deserved to live, honestly.
... and when Franko dies we get victory music. Like seriously, he dies at the very end, it's barely noticed, they spend a second on him, and suddenly "We did it boys! :D" noises fill the ears
... and when Franko dies we get victory music. Like seriously, he dies at the very end, it's barely noticed, they spend a second on him, and suddenly "We did it boys! :D" noises fill the ears
ah well, that was neat.
I kinda regret this thread, but fuggit, it's here.
I kinda regret this thread, but fuggit, it's here.
